Emotion-Focused Workbook: A Guide to Compassionate Self-Reflection

I am a therapist. Every day I have the privilege of accompanying my clients into their emotional world. What we encounter together is often painful, scary, shameful, unfamiliar or otherwise challenging for them to navigate--yet they persist. Hour after hour, I find myself witness to what I can only describe as an awesome and relentless will to heal. I know my clients’ courageous work continues in the days between our therapy sessions. They have told me they want resources (videos, exercises, worksheets…) to help them on their path, and I have wanted to provide that for them. That’s how this workbook was born. While my clients are my inspiration, the exercises and recommended resources in this workbook will be beneficial to anyone working towards greater emotional flexibility and improved relationships—whether you are currently in therapy or not. In Section I (Why Emotion Focused) you will be introduced to the purpose and power of your emotions. You will also learn about forces and factors beyond your control that may have shaped your current relationship to your emotions and contributed to various forms of suffering (anxiety, depression, relationship difficulties…). This kind of understanding makes both compassion for self and new ways of relating to yourself and others possible. In Section II (Emotion Focused Journaling), you will be guided in exploring your internal experience while reflecting on a difficult event. My clients often tell me that reflecting on upsetting events between sessions can trigger shame/judgment, rumination (re-playing the event over and over), shutting down or impulsively acting on feelings in ways that increase pain and suffering. The aim of Section II is to provide guidance and an alternative: reflection on challenging circumstances becomes an opportunity for self-soothing, non-judgmental self exploration, and movement towards your immediate goals and long-term values.