Finding Calm for the Expectant Mom: Tools for Reducing Stress, Anxiety, and Mood Swings During Your Pregnancy - Softcover

Domar, Alice D.; Curry Oakes, Sheila

 
9780399173134: Finding Calm for the Expectant Mom: Tools for Reducing Stress, Anxiety, and Mood Swings During Your Pregnancy
Softcover
ISBN 10: 0399173137 ISBN 13: 9780399173134
Verlag: Penguin Publishing Group, 2016

Inhaltsangabe

This invaluable resource shows moms-to-be how to manage stress during pregnancy.

Pregnancy is exciting and exhilarating, but it can also be physically and psychologically demanding. The myth, perpetuated by social media, says that you should be “glowing,” but in reality, you may be anxious and find yourself on an emotional roller coaster. And that is okay. Feeling stressed and moody are very normal reactions to the changes your body is going through, the thoughts you might have about how your pregnancy will impact your career and relationships, and the social pressure to have a perfect pregnancy. High levels of stress and anxiety are not good for you or your baby, but there are ways to cope with and counteract these feelings, put them in perspective, and bring peace to your pregnancy. It is indeed possible to learn new skills that will enable you to glow and thrive.

In addition to featuring fun quizzes, stories of women with whom Dr. Alice Domar has worked, and information, advice, and encouragement, Finding Calm for the Expectant Mom includes mind-body techniques that can relieve stress, anxiety, and moodiness. With the tools and problem-solving approach presented here, you can adjust your expectations, restructure negative thought patterns, cultivate resilience, and not only meet the challenges of pregnancy, but happily anticipate the most amazing experience of your life: becoming a mother.

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Über die Autorin bzw. den Autor

Alice D. Domar, PhD, is the founder and executive director of the Domar Centers for Mind/Body Health and conducts groundbreaking research on the relationship between stress and various women's health conditions. She is an associate clinical professor of obstetrics, gynecology, and reproductive biology, part-time, at Harvard Medical School, director of integrative care at Boston IVF, and a senior staff psychologist at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center. She lives in the Boston area with her husband and two children.

Sheila Curry Oakes is a writer who has collaborated on books with numerous experts in the fields of women's health and wellness, parenting, and personal growth. A former publishing professional, she lives with her family outside of New York City.

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Chapter 1

Am I Crazy, or Am I Just Pregnant?

You're pregnant! Most people are probably telling you "Congratulations!" "How exciting!" "How thrilling!" You may feel thrilled and excited but likely also worried, nauseated, and a whole host of other physical and emotional symptoms-some of which you expected, but others of which, I assume, caught you by surprise. You are probably also coming to realize that being pregnant carries with it responsibilities and expectations-maybe more than you anticipated. Of course, you want to do whatever is in your power to ensure the health and well-being of your baby. But some of those expectations can weigh heavily on you, and it may be a surprise how physically and psychologically challenging pregnancy can be.

No one really talks about how most pregnancies are not spent being blissfully happy or symptom-free. In fact, you've probably heard it a million times: Pregnant women glow. They are so radiant, so breathtakingly gorgeous, so bursting with feminine allure and blooming loveliness that the media can't help but shout about it. And shout they do. When celebrities are pregnant, they seem to sail through the nine months without morning sickness or significant weight gain and are back in their skinny jeans before you know it. And oh, how they glow!

I could fill this book with the claims people make about the glow of pregnancy. It is an idea that is entrenched in our pregnancy mythology. It is something we all want to believe; wouldn't it be wonderful to be radiant for nine months? Except for one thing: It's simply not true. The "glow" of pregnancy is a complete myth. Sure, some of us shine a bit when we're expecting a baby. But to expect to glow for forty weeks is unrealistic. (Listen to what Jessica Simpson had to say about this: "People always say that pregnant women have a glow. And I say it's because you're sweating to death.") The reality of pregnancy is not so glittery or glamorous. The normal physical and emotional symptoms of pregnancy-especially in the first trimester-are often the polar opposite of "glowing."

I'll tell you a story that illustrates this perfectly. As the founder and director of a unique health-care organization, the Domar Centers for Mind/Body Health, I work alongside a staff of integrative care providers-psychologists, acupuncturists, nutritionists, yoga teachers, and others-to help patients tend to their physical and emotional health. We provide a wide range of services, including the Mind/Body Program for Infertility, which teaches relaxation strategies and stress-management skills while offering support for women who are struggling to conceive.

At the beginning and the end of each ten-week program, each patient completes an assessment designed to measure symptoms of depression. We use it to compare depression symptoms in it our patients at the start and the end of our programs. Almost always, we discover that women feel far less depressed at the conclusion of our programs. Well, this is the case for nearly every woman who participates in our programs-with one exception: newly pregnant women. When they take the questionnaire, their scores for depressive symptoms are often off the charts.

The interesting thing is, they don't score high on the depression scale because women in their first trimester all feel depressed about being pregnant. On the contrary, they are thrilled about it. So why do they score so high on depressive symptoms? Well, when you compare some of the most common symptoms of pregnancy with symptoms of depression, you really can't tell the difference between the two. And we're talking about the normal symptoms of pregnancy.

Pregnancy    Depression

Worry about the future    Worry about the future

Loss of energy    Loss of energy

Changes in sleeping patterns    Changes in sleeping patterns

Changes in appetite    Changes in appetite

Difficulty concentrating    Difficulty concentrating

Tiredness or fatigue    Tiredness or fatigue

Loss of interest in sex    Loss of interest in sex

It comes down to this: The physical and emotional symptoms of the first trimester can be so similar to those of depression that it's hard to find a newly pregnant woman who doesn't appear at least somewhat depressed. Or at least feel yucky. Even if she is eagerly looking forward to being a mother, she can be sad, anxious, or worried about her pregnancy or impending motherhood.

Then, on top of it all, pregnant women often feel guilty because they don't feel fabulous. Or they feel guilty because they do. And they feel guilty if they voice a complaint about being pregnant-especially if they have worked hard to become pregnant. If others put a positive spin on pregnancy, they feel badly if they don't match their enthusiasm. Or, if others put a negative spin on pregnancy, it's easy to go down the negative rabbit hole and be upset by horror stories or see any of their own symptoms or feelings as largely negative. Or they can feel completely confused because they are trying to balance the challenges of physical symptoms with the happiness they are feeling or, conversely, feel perfectly fine physically but strangely ambivalent about having a baby. Pregnancy emotions can range from giddy one moment to depleted the next.

Tess, mom of an eight-month-old, expresses what many women feel: "The first trimester was a mix of emotions. My husband and I were on the fence about having kids, so it was a little scary that I was pregnant. At around six or eight weeks, I thought, 'This is a terrible idea,' but at the same time I was really happy . . . and anxious, scared, and excited. Everything I could be feeling-I did! By the second trimester, people were telling me 'don't be stressed,' but trying not to be stressed is so stressful!"

Feeling anxious, moody, and exhausted during pregnancy is normal. So is not feeling anxious, moody, and exhausted. There is no one right way to feel. But the fantasy of contentedly rubbing our growing bellies is only partially true. You can in fact be maternal to the max while simultaneously resenting how nauseated and tired you are feeling. Feeling happy and overwhelmed at the same time is the definition of a normal pregnancy.

Normal Pregnancy Perspectives

"I'm not in it to be pregnant; I'm in it for the baby!"

"I am surprised by how much I loved being pregnant. I loved it."

"No one told me it would be this uncomfortable."

"I don't want to be pregnant again, but I enjoyed giving birth."

"I was a little sad that the pregnancy was over."

Surprising Symptoms

During pregnancy-especially the first months-you are far more likely to be gagging than glowing. In fact, it's common to feel all kinds of surprising physical and emotional symptoms. Even if you are totally thrilled to be pregnant, you're likely to start your nine-month journey experiencing uncomfortable symptoms, including fatigue, nausea, breast tenderness, bloating, insomnia, gassiness, and aversions to certain odors. And until it happens to you-until you start feeling the physical and emotional effects of pregnancy-you simply can't imagine what it feels like, even if you've watched friends and family members go through it. Many of my...

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Verlag
Penguin Publishing Group
Erscheinungsdatum
2016
Sprache
Englisch
ISBN 10 
0399173137
ISBN 13 
9780399173134
Einband
Taschenbuch
Anzahl der Seiten
288
Kontakt zum Hersteller
Nicht verfügbar
Verantwortliche Person
Buchbär
info@buchbaer.de

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