The Truth about Dating, Love & Just Being Friends

Thomas Nelson

Contents

INTRODUCTION..............................................................................V1. WHAT'S UP, MILLEYS?....................................................................12 DATING, FACTOIDS, AND QUARK-GLUON PLASMA...............................................133. DUMB DATING MISTAKES—THAT EVEN SMART PEOPLE MAKE.................................344. WHAT TO EXPECT WHILE YOU'RE EXPECTING— A DATE....................................525. LOVE AND OTHER CHEMICAL IMBALANCES.....................................................656. JUST FRIENDS!?!........................................................................877. WHAT DO THEY WANT, ANYWAY?.............................................................1098. CRAZY, DUMB, AND MIXED-UP FEELINGS.....................................................1319. MISERABLE TEENAGERS....................................................................14310. HAPPY TEENAGERS.......................................................................16711. IT'S NOT OKAY TO BE DUMB..............................................................18812. THE PROBLEM WITH FALLING IN LOVE WITH MYTHICAL CREATURES..............................21313. WHY THIS BOOK COULD BE STUPID.........................................................22314. LOTS OF OTHER IMPORTANT STUFF THAT WE'RE FINALLY GETTING TO LATER.....................239NOTES.....................................................................................243

Chapter One

Do you know what large bird buries its head in the sand? The ostrich, right? No. Wrong. There has never been a single documented account of the largest bird in the world burying its head in the sand. It was a guy named Pliny the Elder, a Roman historian, who most likely mistook his observation of the giant bird. What really happens is that the bird lies down on the ground, usually on its nest, and flattens its neck out, so that it can scan the horizon and look for predators. Pliny also thought that the ostrich could stare at its eggs with such intensity that it would make them hatch. Really, man? 'Cause that seems logical.

So what's the point with the ostrich? The point is that we make all kinds of observations about all kinds of things. Some are right, some not so much. For example, people say things all the time about teens and their habits, opinions, and lifestyles. And they love to talk about how texting makes you dumb. Not true. It does, however, make you a horrible driver. So please ... stop trying to kill pedestrians!

Although it's not good to text and drive, it is good to make observations. It can be helpful to know the habits of the people you are traveling through life with. Not so you can be like everyone else, but so you can at least know some of the things that make you a part of the group. Just keep an open mind and make careful observations. I mean, you don't want to be an ostrich trying to bury its head in the sand only to find out that you aren't supposed to do that. Mainly because you would suffocate, and you would be a bald bird.

Traveling the Teen Highway

You may not know this about yourself, but right now you're on the road to somewhere. Do you know where you're going? No? Well, that could be a bad thing, but it's not necessarily. Being uncertain of where you are going doesn't make you lost. I mean, I guess it sometimes does, obviously. But not always. Sometimes it's okay to not know exactly where you are headed, at least not right away. This kind of represents your teen years in a lot of ways. You are figuring stuff out. You don't have to have it all "figured out" already. Big distinction. You are on a journey, and that is the adventure of it.

On any journey, it's helpful to observe the other journeyers traveling with you. It would be sad to be hiking along in the woods for years and never see the fifty other people hiking along with you just a few feet away. Then one day you suddenly see them, and you're like, "Oh man, have you been out here the whole time? Seriously? We probably could have talked and shared some beef jerky or trail mix or something, you know. How did I not see you?"

It's sad when people do that. 'Cause it's fun to travel with others, especially when you are all on the same journey. So let's check out a few facts about your fellow life travelers.

A Snapshot of Your Generation

Maybe you hate computers. Maybe you love texting. Maybe you grew up in a religious and/or spiritual environment. Maybe you want to wait until you have seen Africa and Europe before you have children. Maybe you have kissed a lot of people or have even messed around. Maybe you just hold hands and are saving your first kiss until you are married. You could be a capitalistic, youth-group fanatic who loves Jesus and Republicans, or you could be a person who couldn't care less about politics. Maybe you love aardvarks. Get my drift? You could add twenty-five more categories of likes and dislikes, and you might be on either side of any of them. Either way, you simply fall into a very mixed bag of young people who have been born since the 1980s.

You are the Millennial Generation. Or as I sometimes like to call you, the Milleys. But I'm not great at nicknames.

And while you are unique and special—just like everyone else—there are a lot of things you and your peers may have in common, or not. So here is a little snapshot that describes some, only some, of you and the people in your "generation."

Sorry, You're Labeled

The Millennial Generation is meant to refer to those born from about 1980 until just after 2000. This means that you are the first generation of people who will become adults in a new millenium—the 2000s. The people before you are referred to as Generation X; they were born from 1965 to about 1980. Actually, I'm in the Millennial Generation with you, although I teeter on the edge of Generation X.

Before Generation X, we had the Baby Boomer Generation, which many of your parents fall into. Baby Boomers were born after World War II when everyone went on a baby-making crusade and moved to the suburbs. This was the age of the "white picket fence" and the mom who always had dinner ready for the family, which she cooked while wearing a dress and an apron. Not something you identify with much. Before that, there was the Silent Generation, which includes adults born from 1928 through 1945. The Silent Generation were the children of the Great Depression and World War II. Their title referred to their conformist views (that means just going along with the crowd) and their loyalty to politics. The Greatest Generation were the adults who fought in World War II, and the Lost Generation was the generation before that; they fought in World War I. So, you see, generations—like people—have different personalities. That's the simple way of saying it.

Why is this important, Chad? I'm starting to get bored.

It's important because YOU, the Millennials, are creating your own personality as well. You are thought to be very expressive, more liberal than other generations, open to new ideas and change, and more confident and upbeat than other generations.

And while you are more diverse, both in ethnicity and in culture than older adults, your...