"Mark Chabus had it all: a beautiful girlfriend, a loving family, and a new direction in life. At twenty-three years old, he was pursuing his passion for cooking at the French Culinary Institute in New York City. His life came to a screeching halt when his girlfriend perished in the World Trade Center on the morning of September 11, 2001. Chabus's inspiring story describes the emotional pain he endured, as well as an eight-year journey toward healing, self-discovery, and spiritual awakening. Chabus takes readers on a voyage from heartache and suffering to a place of strength and harmony. In Remembering Your Spirit, Chabus shares his evidential stories that provide proof that the spirits of our deceased loved ones do assuredly survive death. He also shares how this horrific tragedy became the very catalyst for recalling his soul's purpose. Through his true stories, Chabus provides hope, healing, and inspiration for those struggling through life's difficult times."

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Remembering your Spirit

A story about 9/11, life after death and learning to heal

By MARK CHABUS

Balboa Press

CHAPTER 1

September 10, 2001

I was wired from another adrenaline-filled night of cooking.It was about a month into culinary school and felt I like mylife was right on track. I imagined I would marry my girlfriend,Lynne, start a family, and eventually open my own restaurant.I had dreams, big dreams. I was propped up by the pillows inmy bed as the fall breeze snuck in quietly through the window.I wondered if Lynne was feeling better. She had a hard day atwork and took it out on her father, which left her feeling guiltyand unsettled. We had our last conversation much earlier in thenight.

"Why don't you just apologize? We all say things that weregret in the heat of the moment. I am sure he will understand."I suggested.

"I'm tired, I don't feel well, and I just want to go to sleep," shesaid to me before finally hanging up. It was another sleepless nightfor me as I clicked from one channel to another. I stopped at LarryKing Live and spotted a familiar face with considerable interest.It must have been well passed three o' clock in the morning,and I was surprised to see the psychic medium John Edward ashis guest. King fielded a call from an unidentified woman. Thefollowing transpired:

"Why is the Niagara Falls significant?" Edward asked.

The woman responded, "I was just there."

He then proceeded to tell the woman that her late husbandwas coming through to him, and he had a very clear message forher. "When you were there, you found a feather and you told yourdaughter that that was her daddy," stated Edward.

The woman moaned and sobbed and was clearly an emotionalmess. "Yes, yes!" she cried.

Now, I was completely sucked in. I couldn't believe what I justheard. A woman called up to get a message, and this psychic guycouldn't have been more accurate. How could he have known that?I asked myself. The sounds of her emotions made it clear to methat his words were precisely what she needed to hear. I wiped thefew tears that had surfaced as soon as I heard the woman weep. Iwas surprised at my own emotional state. Why am I getting upset?I don't even know what it's like to lose someone. For some reason,I connected to that woman and could feel her pain. Up to thispoint, I had only lost my grandfathers but besides being sad atthe funeral, I don't remember it affecting me too much. Thecommercial break had ended, and the show resumed with Kingasking John Edward to verify something.

"Is it true that you made a pact with your mother before shedied—that she would send you a sign?" Edward responded thathe most certainly did.

When the show culminated, I was left wide-eyed and wrackingmy brain to think of who I could approach to make the same pact.Should I ask my grandmother? Who do I know that's on their wayout? Someone has got to make this pact with me. How will I everknow if there is an afterlife unless someone comes back to tell mefirsthand? This went on for almost an hour until I finally decidedto take some Tylenol PM and get some sleep.

September 11, 2001

"Mark, Mark, wake up! It's Lynne's building! Lynne's buildingwas just hit. A plane hit her building!" My mom had abruptlycrashed into my room and was screaming hysterically at the footof my bed. My hands firmly pressed the skin on my face as I triedto grasp what all of this commotion was about. I sat up confused,attempting to wipe away my grogginess. My mom proceeded toturn on the television and moan. I then slid down to the edgeof the bed with my eyes fixed upon the screen. I could see blacksmoke billowing out of the building. So many thoughts wereflooding my mind. Why is she freaking out? There is no way thatLynne was in that building. Even if that was the trade center, there'smore than one building, and thousands of people work there. I'm sureshe is fine. I reached for my cell phone and tried calling her butstrangely I got nothing; not even a ring. I was perplexed as to whatwas really happening. I continued staring at the building in aweand listened to the reporters repeat themselves over and over.

"A low-flying plane has apparently crashed into one of thetowers at the world trade center. It appeared to be a large, passengercommercial jet plane." Then I heard them report that the plane wasembedded into the actual building. As I continued to watch, I sawflames blazing, debris falling, and smoke continuously pouringout the sides of the building. Less then five minutes passed andthen the unthinkable; I watched a huge commercial plane appearout of nowhere and abruptly crash into the other tower. Burstsof flames and smoke instantly exploded out of the opposing side.Oh my God! What the hell is happening? Is the world ending? Arewe being attacked? Where did that plane come from? I jumped fromthe bed and raced upstairs leaving my frenzied mother howlingand screaming.

"I need to try a different phone. My cell phone is not working,"I screamed. I grabbed the house phone and began dialing furiously.I ran over to the large-screen television in the corner of the livingroom. I turned it on and continued to watch the horror of twobuildings burning wildly. I flipped from channel to channellistening to various descriptions of the same scenario. Everystation told their version and slowly unfolded more allegations andpresumptions. What the hell is going on? I listened closely as theyrevealed that this was a terrorist attack. I frantically continuedtrying to reach her. Oh Lynne, please, please call me. I'm reallyworried now. This can't be happening. Why aren't the damn phonesworking? Why isn't she calling me? After almost forty-five minutesof watching this horror, the reporters announced another blow;one of the towers had just collapsed. Oh my God. This is bad--thisis really bad. I knew that she worked on a high floor in one of thetowers but I couldn't remember which one. I grabbed the phoneand called Lynne's parents to see if they had heard anything fromher. Her sister told me that they had been trying to call her as wellbut were unsuccessful. I continued to pace back and forth in adistraught emotional state. I suddenly remembered the programI watched the night before. If only I had the chance to talk to Lynneabout it. I began to think, if God forbid she was trapped in thatbuilding, would she try to contact me? Would she give me a sign?She knew nothing about that sort of stuff. No, this is crazy. Whyam I thinking like this? She got out. I know she did. She must have.There's no way she was in that building. She must be safe.

Less than thirty minutes passed before I witnessed the mosthorrific thing. Live, before the nation's eyes, the second towercrumbled. As the building crashed to the ground, black smokeerupted and furiously filled the crowded streets. My fear grewimmensely. I collapsed in disbelief. "No, no, no!" I screamed.Maybe she wasn't in there. Maybe she escaped. I saw so many peoplerunning in the streets; maybe she was one of them. I turned awayfrom the screen and began walking toward the window in a state ofpanic. More and more thoughts were inundating me. Please, pleasecall me. I need to know that you are okay. At that very moment,I had an overwhelming feeling that someone or something wastrying to get my attention from behind me. I slowly turned myhead and immediately noticed something incredible. A small greyfeather was dancing up against the sliding glass door. Oh,...

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