"Do not read this book in public. Your guffaws will prompt the stares of strangers. Your tears will streak your mascara in a most uncomely manner. Elizabeth is that kind of writer: funny and self-deprecating, keen-eyed and sincere. Which is why, among the 600 writers we considered for our blog, she was an immediate, irresistible standout." Lilan Patri, Deputy Editor, parenting.com "The word 'barf' appears 28 times in this book. (Synonyms 'ralph' 'puke' and 'hurl' a total of 7.) The word 'coffee,' appears thirty-three times. 'Global socio-economic politics?' -- Not a once." Meet Elizabeth, a former Congressional Press Secretary now living in a world of bad morning sickness, sleep deprivation, twisted toddler logic, and mommy friends who dye their hair with Grecian 5 Hair color for men. (It's cheap and you can paint it on your widow's peak while the kids are in the tub.) It's got everything: haddock-love, nightmares featuring Glynnis Johns, the occasional f-bomb and an answer to the age-old question of what ABBA must've seen on acid. Oh, and there's a lot of barfing.

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When she was 22 years old, Elizabeth Soutter Schwarzer interned at NASA, and spent some time in mission control during live shuttle flights. At 23 she married a US Marine; and at 24 she was a Press Secretary for a Congressman. By the time she turned 26 she was hosting her own radio show and authoring a weekly Op-Ed column. At 27 Elizabeth became a mother. Then things got really interesting. Now 31, Elizabeth lives in New England with Cute Husband and their offspring, the pets, and an occasional stray Ducky. She is author of the popular www.damomma.com

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