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You are a mind reader, born with an extraordinary ability to understand what others think, feel, believe, want, and know. It?s a sixth sense you use every day, in every personal and professional relationship you have. At its best, this ability allows you to achieve the most important goal in almost any life: connecting, deeply and intimately and honestly, to other human beings. At its worst, it is a source of misunderstanding and unnecessary conflict, leading to damaged relationships and broken dreams.
How good are you at knowing the minds of others? How well can you guess what others think of you, know who really likes you, or tell when someone is lying? How well do you really understand the minds of those closest to you, from your spouse to your kids to your best friends? Do you really know what your coworkers, employees, competitors, or clients want?
In this illuminating exploration of one of the great mysteries of the human mind, University of Chicago psychologist Nicholas Epley introduces us to what scientists have learned about our ability to understand the most complicated puzzle on the planet?other people?and the surprising mistakes we so routinely make. Why are we sometimes blind to the minds of others, treating them like objects or animals? Why do we sometimes talk to our cars, or the stars, as if there is a mind that can hear us? Why do we so routinely believe that others think, feel, and want what we do when, in fact, they do not? And why do we believe we understand our spouses, family, and friends so much better than we actually do? Mindwise will not turn other people into open books, but it will give you the wisdom to revolutionize how you think about them?and yourself.
Mindwise stands out from the crowd. It is surprising, intelligent and convincing (Daniel Finkelstein The Times)
Psychologist Nicholas Epley's Mindwise provides a guide to understanding the minds of others. His engrossing book outlines the strategies that we use: projecting from our own minds, using stereotypes, and inferring from others' actions ... Epley is a lucid and magnetic host, and his book ... is crammed with evidence-based research. ( Independent)
Mindwise is good reading for negotiators, the makers of public policy, heck, for anyone who interacts with other people, and that should be all of us. Mr. Epley is a genial, informative host in this tour of some of the most interesting findings in the social psychology of understanding one another, which he calls "mind-reading." His examples are drawn from the headlines as well as the peer-reviewed literature, and he keeps things going at a quick pace without dumbing-down the science. ( Wall Street Journal)
Epley lays out his argument alternately as thesis and antithesis in clear, engaging prose. He cites plenty of research, but illustrates his examples from everyday life and popular culture. This makes for enjoyable reading. ( New York Journal of Books)
A comfortingly slim volume about the ability we all have to understand others ... how wonderful to have this insight into the extent of our ignorance (Dominic Lawson Sunday Times)
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