CHAPTER 1
Fearless Flying
John reluctantly arrived at Dr. Lerman's office to see ifhe could overcome his fear of flying. This phobia is verycommon, along with its related fear of not being in control.White-knuckled flyers are found on every flight. There are thosewho will drive for days rather than board an airplane for a fourhour flight. The panic reaction is exacerbated and reinforcedevery time there is a need to fly. For all the rational argumentspresenting safety records and comparisons to automobiledriving, the remotest possibility of a plane crash carries a muchgreater intense emotional reaction.
There is no logical or rational basis for this fear.After decades of commercial flights, it's become commonknowledge that flying is technically safer than driving. Thequalifications and regular testing of pilots can be rationallydiscussed. The required inspections of planes as mandatedby the Federal Aviation Authority, and the advancements inweather forecasting for flights to avoid unsafe areas, are alsorational points. Using conscious thoughts to explain each areaof concern about a fear can lead people to the conclusion thatthe fear is irrational. However, these people continue to believethere is a greater degree of control exercised when driving.
All fears and phobias are the result of negative messagesor experiences absorbed into our minds. In addition, judgmentalmessages are constantly given about subjects like behavingin a certain way or physically looking different, clothingchoices, sexuality concerns, voicing opinions, supportingpolitical candidates, and having certain friends. For many,these messages are heard as rigid expectations. A belief ofinadequacy can develop, triggering a fear of being controlled.
The assortment of messages, coupled with theanticipation of fear we learn, often become internalized, andinfluences the choices and decisions we make. While logicalthought and supportive assurances may work for some peoplewith mild nervousness or worries, it does not work for thosewith an obsessive fear, and certainly did not work for John. Heknew all of the above, but such facts were not able to alleviatehis fear.
John was not consciously aware of why flying wassuch a fear. He just knew that in order to be successful, itwas something he had to overcome. As the owner of a smallmanufacturing business, John was the primary salespersonresponsible for meeting with all potential vendors andcustomers. Despite a desire to expand the client network, itwas restricted by his fear of flying. The business could not growunless the customer base increased. He had to fly.
The thought of flying stirred up nauseating fear andprofound sleep disturbance. John would get so worked up heneeded at least two shots of alcohol before boarding, withoutregard for the time of day. As soon as the flight attendantsbrought the drink cart through, he would have another drink.His doctor prescribed anti-anxiety and sleep medications. Johndoubled the dosages. He tried every home remedy suggestedto him. Nothing worked.
John's girlfriend suggested he try hypnosis. He initiallyscoffed at the idea&mdashhe was a successful business man and,"damn it," he could solve this problem on his own. His girlfrienddescribed her successful experience nine years earlier. Shewent to a clinical hypnotist to stop smoking and it worked. Shepersisted in her pleading, and after several months, he agreedto attend an initial appointment.
Doubtful and skeptical do not begin to describe John'sthoughts and expectations of hypnosis. To his credit, hewas highly motivated to overcome his fear and seize a widerrange of business opportunities. For John, the result was moreimportant than the process. He became very knowledgeableabout fears and phobias by spending a considerable amounttime on the Internet researching, hoping to find a logicalanswer. He came to understand that his fear was irrational.
The root cause for John's fear of flying was based on thesame conviction driving him to be a successful businessman. Heneeded to be in control. As a passenger in an airplane he wasdependent upon external elements like the pilot, crew, aircraftand weather conditions. John was not in charge.
The issue of external control was exacerbated by thecheck-in security screening at the airport. It reminded him ofthe potential terrorist threat, which caused more worry. Then hispersonal belongings were exposed to total strangers, creating asense of invasion. Additional, he feared a potential body search,should he be identified for displaying excessive nervousness,which he often did.
The solution to John's problem was to change his focusby reframing the situation. Rather than placing flying in thecenter of his awareness, he learned to unconsciously shift theframe to concentrate on the expected success of the trip. Intrance, John learned to visualize his arrival, the meetings andinformal discussions, and how he could achieve his desiredresults. John's anxiety became incidental by focusing onactivities he could control in order to impress the client andsecure new business.
For the return flight, he learned how to utilize hiscreativity to imagine experiencing the beneficial changes thetrip would foster for his company. Specific, tangible objectivesexcited his conscious mind. John's newly developed abilityto reframe his situation allowed him to unconsciously releasehis fear of flying. In order to anchor all of the post-hypnoticsuggestions he received, John learned a simple self-triggeringsignal. It...
