Live, Learn, Love!

BALBOA PRESS

Contents

Foreword...........................................................................xiPreface............................................................................xvAcknowledgements...................................................................xxiChapter 1: Live, Learn, Love – Our Legacy....................................3Chapter 2: Achieving Greatness.....................................................26Chapter 3: The Pain in Our Lives...................................................37Chapter 4: Is Life a Grand Plan or Choice?.........................................43Chapter 5: Life Is My Great Teacher................................................75Chapter 6: Three Simple Steps to Leave Your Legacy.................................129Chapter 7: Step 1 – LIVE.....................................................140Chapter 8: Step 2 – LEARN....................................................158Chapter 9: Step 3 – LOVE.....................................................170Chapter 10: Conclusion—The Path to Your Personal Prowess.....................183About the Author...................................................................203

Chapter One

I am in a large, packed hall waiting my turn to be hugged, waiting for Amma's magical touch. There are slow, long, winding queues. Everyone is engaged in inconsequential chat, talking to each other to pass the time. It is hot and humid; the fans are whirring but not making much difference. Siva and I are visiting with our dear friends in Brisbane. We meet mutual friends we have not seen for many years. I find it strange that I suddenly hear myself talking to everyone around me, telling them about recent happenings in my life. I cannot stop myself. I am gushy and passionate. I share with them intimate details of what is most important to me, what I want to achieve in my life, and what I want to do to ensure I make a major difference as a result of the gift of my life. As we edge our way to the front of the queue, about to be hugged by Amma, I wake up with a jolt. I realise I had been dreaming. I also note with disappointment that I did not make it to the front of the queue in time to get my hug from Amma.

What did this mean? Why was I dreaming about Amma? I had never met her. Perhaps there was a message I had to take note of. The living Saint Amma is world-famous for her dedication to spreading her message of love and compassion, dedicating her life to her mission, travelling the world, and being available to physically embrace everyone she meets with a simple but profound gesture of the largeness of her human spirit. I believe, like her, that each of us possesses that same ability.

I had just had a dream about what my purpose was—my vision for how I wanted to spend the remaining days of my life. At first, I shrugged it off as just a dream and turned over, wanting to fall off to sleep again. But something happened to me after that dream. I was very deeply touched, perhaps at the soul level. In the quiet of the night, I reflected on my dream. What did it mean? For some inexplicable reason, I could not go back to sleep. I had to do something about that mystical experience.

I got out my notebook and put pen to paper. What I wrote in my notebook essentially became the outline and contents of this book. I believe I was touched physically, emotionally, and spiritually that night. My dream jolted me into a creative space—almost as if I was receiving my purpose from a divine channel. I was inspired by my dream.

Heritage: A Burden or Blessing?

I did not see being oppressed as adversity. Oppression was a lesson I needed to learn!

I was born in apartheid South Africa in the late '50s. I was born as a fifth-generation Indian out of India. I'm still an Indian in my body, mind, and spirit. My great-grandparents came as indentured farm labourers to work on the sugarcane plantations in South Africa in the 1860s. Cheap labour resulting in forced relocations was one of the effects of India being colonised by Britain at the time.

My family had the chance for a free passage back to India after five years of working as farm labourers. Life was tough. They got meagre rations of food and little money for their work. There was no access to formal education or social benefits. My grandfather, Thatha, was a fisherman who caught and sold fish for a living. My grandmother, Amma, cooked meals and made up packed lunches she sold to supplement the family income. There were eight children in the family (my uncles and aunts).

Hope is important because it can make the present moment less difficult to bear. If we believe that tomorrow will be better, we can bear a hardship today. (Thich Nhat Hanh)

My father was a bus driver who left the farm and moved to the city to pursue a better life. He was taken in to live with my grandparents and the extended family. This is when he met my mother. She was pampered growing up, and before you knew it, she was a child bride, married at age fourteen. I was the eldest of five children, the first granddaughter, and was truly spoiled by my very large extended family.

We all lived in the same house as one big, happy family. There were at least twenty people, including two of my uncles, living there with their own families, too. I remember the house—a large wood and iron house with three bedrooms and a large sitting room that doubled as a sleeping area at night. I shared a studio couch with one of my aunts. When I look at the few photos I have of my early years, I see the pretty dresses my aunt stitched for me, made with much detail and deep love.

Despite the hardship and difficulties of living in such close quarters, I do not remember the real financial hardship that the family experienced. Perhaps I was still very young and was spared at the time. I was the focus of the family, made to feel special and loved. It was the triumph of spirit within my family—the spirit that allowed for love, happiness, and focus on hope beyond our current living conditions, circumstances, environment, and social position—that I so fondly remember.

All was about to change! My happy (although poor) life was short-lived when in the early sixties we were split from living together as one happy, extended family. The Group Areas Act was about to move people out! The Act was government legislation that evicted people from areas they lived in to areas allocated by race. The dwellings were small, and my grandparents were relocated to accommodation for the aged. I was five years old at the time.

I was the family's hope for the future. Huge expectations were placed on me, but more importantly, my family believed in me—even as I grew older when I didn't believe in myself. They talked about me being special and being the first one to be educated so the family could escape its past. I was the ticket to a better life for future generations. I felt I was carrying the responsibility for change for not only my generation, but also all the Indians who had moved to South Africa in the 1860s, 150 years before. This expectation was a huge burden. At the same time, it gave huge hope for the future. I felt the need to do something that would change the course of our lives and alter the effects...