As we were getting drinks one day, a little girl said, "Mrs. Noser, when this fountain runs out of water, can you fill it with Kool-Aid" It is no secret that a group of five-year-olds have the ability to provide an interesting and entertaining perspective on life. Just ask Carol Porter Noser, a veteran kindergarten teacher who for thirty years listened in on the amusing and endearing comments made by her students. Noser considers teaching young children to be one of the best jobs in the world. After one of her students asked her one day, "Do you have a job" and another asked her, "Do you work" she soon realized that they all instinctively knew she loved to teach. From early on, Noser jotted down the silly, sad, and funny comments her students made, eventually compiling a collection after she retired. As she shares one witty anecdote after another, she provides a glimpse into the very active and imaginative minds of five-year-olds who never let anyone forget how smart they really are about what is important in life. From rather open discussions about their family, to the misuse of words, to questions about God, the children profiled in Kindergarten Conversations share their innocent and honest views of the world.

Kindergarten Conversations

Treasured Memories from Thirty Years of TeachingBy Carol Porter Noser

iUniverse, Inc.

Copyright © 2012 Carol Porter Noser
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4697-6385-9

Contents

Chapter One

What a Job!

I consider teaching young children to be one of the best jobs in the world. Even though teaching kindergarten can be very stressful and frustrating, it is also very rewarding. I loved my job. I guess that was apparent to at least one of my students, because one day he asked me, "Do you have a job?"

On another occasion, my assistant and I were busily opening twenty-four milk cartons and salad dressing packets at lunch when a little girl looked up at me and said, "Do you work?"

I said, "Sure, this is my work."

She answered, "No, I mean do you get up and go to work some place every day?"

Sometimes the children melted my heart with their comments. Like when one child said, "Mrs. Noser, I like your heart. It is charming."

Our family doctor's granddaughter was in my class one year, and during that time I went to see him for an allergy problem. When I sat down, he started looking in my hair, and I said, "Are you looking for gray hair?"

"No, a halo," he answered.

"Well, I don't have a halo!" I replied.

"That's not what my granddaughter says."

Sometimes I would hear of little romances blooming in my classroom. I even heard some of the children say whom they were going to marry. Like the little boy who announced, "I'm going to marry Mrs. Noser!"

I taught summer school several times. The other teachers and I would try to make the curriculum as much fun as possible, but of course, it was summer school. However, one little boy certainly had the right attitude when he came in one morning and responded to my request to get out their notebooks with the following: "Mrs. Noser, we would do anything for you."

Another year, at the end of the first day of summer school, Chad came up to me as he was leaving and said, "I had a great day, and you have beautiful hazel-green eyes."

During my career, I have often been called Mom or Grandma. I guess I learned to take it all in stride. However, I wasn't sure how I should take one little girl's comment. Out of the blue she told me, "You should go to Miller's Merry Manor." (Miller's Merry Manor is a nursing home.) It was about this time I seriously started considering retirement!

Sometimes you don't know what the children are thinking. My daughter-in-law, Katie, who is about twenty-six years younger than me, was substituting in a first-grade classroom down the hall from where I was teaching. A little boy came in about a half hour late and missed the opening of class when Katie had introduced herself as Mrs. Noser and told the children she was the daughter-in-law of the kindergarten teacher. John was not shy and went right up to Katie and said, "Who are you?"

Katie simply replied, "I'm Mrs. Noser."

John didn't show any sign of confusion and simply said, "Oh, I had you for kindergarten last year."

The children would often tell the teachers about family conversations. Many times I took their comments with a grain of salt. I wasn't sure what to think when Mary came up to my desk first thing in the morning, after she had put her coat away, and said, "My dad says you're sexy."

Another time the students and I were discussing our sense of smell, and we talked about good smells and bad smells. One little girl said, "My dad doesn't flush the toilet when he poops."

Five-year-olds don't have the best sense of timing. It seemed I was always asking them to hurry up to get something done. Preparing for bus dismissal at the end of the day was usually the worst. One afternoon the students were hurrying to get everything packed in their book bags before the dismissal bell rang. The children were busily taking care of last-minute details and I was passing out papers when, out of the blue and with great intensity, Jordon said, "My dad doesn't cut his toenails!"

Children often blame others for their problems. I guess adults do that too, don't we? Anyway, Katie came into the room one morning and announced, "My dumb dad forgot my medicine!"

(Continues...)

Excerpted from Kindergarten Conversationsby Carol Porter Noser Copyright © 2012 by Carol Porter Noser. Excerpted by permission of iUniverse, Inc.. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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