CHAPTER 1
The bus shifted gears and jerked a little, stirring Blake out of his sleep while he attempted to stretch out as far as the seat would let him. Through the sunlight peeking out of the clouds from the east, his eyesight shifted as he glanced down the Yellowhead Highway, trying to determine how far away from Saskatoon he was. To his left passed Saskatchewan Place, the hockey arena that also doubled as a boundary signpost signaling Saskatoon's outskirts.
Blake sighed and leaned his head against the window. The bus jerked a few more times as it slowed and careened onto Idylwyld Drive. The drive toward downtown was everything Blake remembered. And while he knew that nothing had changed since his last visit, instinct prompted him to still search for any significant changes to those familiar areas. When the bus stopped at the intersection at Thirty-Third Street, a huge Merry Christmas sign made of lights hanging from the street post in the center of the traffic island greeted him. It was almost as if the sign welcomed him home, the subsequent lampposts decorated with lit outlines of candy canes, signaling the way toward downtown.
He turned on his phone and waited a few moments while the bus inched closer and closer to the downtown terminal. Blake's phone vibrated and he quickly pressed one of the side buttons; the message I'M HERE appeared on the screen. He smiled as he adjusted his ball cap and continued to stare out the window.
The bus finally pulled into the terminal and Blake promptly hopped out and stretched. He adjusted the strap on his messenger bag while he grabbed his suitcase and made his way into the main lobby. After a quick scan of the area, he spotted his friend Dave waiting over by the entrance closest to the washrooms. He stood about five feet ten, his baby face still intact from high school. As soon as he spotted Blake, he adjusted his glasses on his face and smiled, Blake quickly heading over to give Dave a hug. The embrace was comically clumsy as Blake found himself trying to pull Dave close to him, his puffy jacket nearly pushing him away. "Merry Christmas, stranger." Dave beamed with a smile. "How was the bus ride back home?"
"It felt like forever," Blake deadpanned while Dave grabbed the suitcase and walked over to Dave's car. Blake then pointed out, "I used to do this trip quite often and it felt like I'd never get home." Dave chuckled as he put the suitcase in the backseat, and they both got in.
When Dave shut his door he asked, "What do you say about breakfast?"
Blake replied, "Breakfast would be perfect right about now."
Dave then said, "Denny's?"
Blake nodded while Dave began to maneuver the car out of downtown. Blake then asked, "Do you have any running around to do today?"
"I've pretty much have the day off today. Campus was closed up last night, so I don't have to be back unless I get called in to the lab on an emergency."
Blake then asked, "How is the IT job going anyhow?"
Dave explained, "It's work, and a fucking lot of it as well. Keep in mind that trying to update the university's aging infrastructure is a huge undertaking." Dave then asked, "What about you? How have things been?"
"I'm doing all right, Dave. Just ..."
As Blake fell, silent Dave asked a few moments later, "What time do you want to go to the house?"
Blake sighed. "Let me mull that over during breakfast."
Dave laughed and said with a smile, "Fair enough."
As they drove up to the restaurant, the darkness that had surrounded him upon arrival to Saskatoon had for the most part melted away. The glitter of Christmas lights had now faded as the sun cast a natural glow on the snow. As they talked, Blake found himself glancing around again for things that might have changed since he was away.
They finally pulled into the parking lot of Denny's, which was situated near the highway that branched out to the great northern unknown vastness of Saskatchewan, one of those back to Edmonton. Blake opened his passenger side door and stepped out, again stretching while Dave locked his car doors.
They walked into the restaurant. The front hostess spotted them immediately and plucked two menus from the slot on the side of the counter and motioned them to follow. She sat them in a booth and sweetly informed them, "Your server will be here shortly."
Dave pointed out as she walked away, "Is there even a point to opening a menu?"
Blake laughed as he reasoned, "I don't get out to Denny's much in Edmonton." Dave blushed as Blake added, "I've kinda saved that tradition for us."
Dave then shut his menu and then asked, "Is it Christmas?"
Blake explained, "I thought I was doing okay this season so far." While a server arrived and poured them each a coffee, Blake explained, "Every year, Dave, I think that maybe I'm overanalyzing the season. That maybe every year because I'm gay and single, I expect too much for the holiday season." He started to mix in a creamer and a bit of sugar to his coffee. "This year, more than anything, Dave, I feel so fucking disconnected from Christmas."
Dave asked, "Do you think that it has anything to do with the actual holiday itself?"
"In my years of retail, I always thought it was the sense of fucking entitlement customers harbored that choked me. People seem to check their patience and goodwill at the door and act like they suck at life." Dave nodded while Blake sipped his coffee and continued, "Then I thought that maybe it was the consumerism that's flooded the season. Obese white-trash fucks with their gazillion kids at Wal-Mart, all scrambling to find that perfect, ever-so-elusive gift for that special someone. That it's the holiday that Disney, Hallmark, Coca-Cola, McDonald's, and Sears have all capitalized on to ram the must-haves down their throats."
Blake then pointed out, "Or maybe it's how every musician nowadays has a fucking Christmas song out. I mean, there are a lot of musicians who need to stay the fuck away from Christmas standards."
Dave then asked, "You're still pissed off over that Christmas version of 'Hands' by Jewel aren't you?"
"No, that's a record company raping a song and reworking it for a Christmas cash-grab."
They both burst out laughing and Blake pointed out, "Christmas music is about Boney M., Vince Guaraldi, Enya, John Lennon, Yoko Ono, and maybe Sarah McLachlan ..." Blake paused for a moment then elaborated, "Only because she does such an amazing rendition of Joni Mitchell's 'River' that nails out of the ball park."
Dave then asked, "What about Michael Bublé?"
Blake grinned. "You only like him because apparently he has a big cock."
Dave blushed as the server came up. She asked, "You two ready to order?"
Blake placed his order, and once Dave made his, Blake pointed out to her, "Make sure his has extra sausage with it." This caused Dave to blush even more while Blake laughed.
When the server walked away with menus in hand, Dave explained, "I can see where you're coming from when it comes to that thing called holiday disconnect."
Blake cocked his head to the side. "Holiday disconnect, eh?"
Dave nodded and pointed out, "It's what I call what I'm normally feeling during the holiday season. It pretty much sums up all the different things that seem to pick apart at me when Christmas arrives."
Blake then pointed out, "It's not that I don't love my family. I think they're the most amazing people on the planet." He then...