Hot CONFIDENCE

BALBOA PRESS

Contents

Introduction: The Invitation...................................ixChapter 1: The Lost Property Box...............................1Chapter 2: Believe Hot.........................................19Chapter 3: Purpose, Presence, and Values.......................45Chapter 4: Make the Dragon Your Pet............................73Chapter 5: Bring on the Sunlit Bowl............................101Chapter 6: Activate Your Attraction Engine.....................131Chapter 7: The Call to Command.................................159Moving Forward: Shine Your Light...............................191Acknowledgments................................................195About the Author...............................................197Bibliography...................................................199

Chapter One

"Begin doing what you want to do now. We are not living in eternity. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand, and melting like a snowflake."

~ Sir Francis Bacon

"You have to choose. It's life or death. Whatever you decide, get on with it, girl."

Alison looked directly at me, her grey-blue eyes reflecting total non-attachment, her lilting Scottish accent ringing in my ears. "Nadine, it's up to you."

I knew she was right. I was neither eating nor drinking. I was sick to my soul. It was crunch time.

Something moved me to reach for my ceremonial drum. I stumbled into my healing room, where my beautiful, painted drum had rested untouched for at least five months.

Weak though I was, I smudged my room with white sage, offering prayers of gratitude for the life and love I had known, for my family, for the countries I had seen, for the clients who had meant so much to me. I offered thanks for the farm, for the healing centers I had established, and all of the wonderful experiences there. I thanked deeply for the joy of having known what it felt like to be on my true path and purpose, and for the privilege of helping so many people.

My prayers felt like messages of goodbye. And, in hindsight, they were: goodbye to an attitude and a life that was to be shed, like a tired old snakeskin.

The fragrant smoke inside the room was thicker than the swirling mist outside the window. I called in my sacred circle, comforted by the familiarity of the ritual, welcoming my spirit guides, guardians, and angels known and unknown to me, to be present.

I set an intention to accept, graciously and with love, whatever I found, in the knowledge that the answer that came to me would be for the highest good of all. I gave myself over to the journey completely.

The drum and my hand melted into one with the regular beat. I have no conscious recall of slipping into a deep trance.

When I came to, the setting sun was casting its magic across the valley below. Autumn light in New Zealand has a very special quality. I watched the valley below fill up like a golden bowl conscious that this was my time of day, my hour of power, at my favorite time of year, and I knew my decision had been made.

That was a turning point in my life. I knew that I had more work to do on the Earth. Flashes of images from the journey I had experienced seemed merged with the honey shafts of light that played across the hills. I was not done this time around. I had a message of love, of peace, of generosity, and of resilience to bring, and I had to live on to do that.

I knew my choice was to embrace life and what I could contribute. What I recall most vividly was asking myself, "Have I lived? Have I really burned my fingertips on life? Did I receive love, and did I give love as best I could have? Has my life really made a difference? Did I serve fully?"

At the time, I thought I was pretty special to have asked myself these questions. I have since found that these questions quite typically are asked, when we face death.

In my work doing Reiki and drama therapy with elderly people and with those who are terminally ill, I found the same or similar questions asked. Many doctors, psychologists, and psychiatrists I have spoken to, and Red Cross aid workers who have witnessed much death throughout Africa, have spoken of similar soul-searching questions raised when people are about to meet their point of passing.

More recently I came across Brendon Burchard's story of his near-fatal car accident, and the three questions he asked himself were: "Did I live fully? Did I love openly? Did I matter?" In his book, The Millionaire Messenger, Burchard quotes Norman Cousins, whose questions were: "Have I lived wisely? Have I loved well? Have I served greatly?"

What will you ask yourself at the end of your days? Will you be wishing that you had been different in your life? Will you be mad or sad with yourself for having missed out on the things that you know you were capable of? Could you have engaged life more fully? Will you be filled with remorse that you did not give and receive love as boldly as you might have? Are there words you never wrote, sang, or spoke? Could you have mattered more? What will you have done to ensure that your life really stood for something and made a difference?

Now is your time. As Alison said to me: "It's time you made a choice." Hot Confidence is all about giving you what you need to take the mini-me in you to a place where you can be extraordinary in all areas. Between these book covers, you have the conscious pathways to give you exactly what you need to become magnificent, so you can confidently answer, "Yes!" to each of the core questions:

"Have I lived consciously, aware and engaging life?"

"Did I receive love and give love as best I could?"

"Has my life made a difference?"

You are extraordinary at your core. Choose to be that!

* * *

Take a Candid Look

If you do nothing differently now, how will you be feeling by the next year? What will you be experiencing three years from now?

How will it be five years on into your future with your ideas unfulfilled, your books unwritten, relationships unresolved, the countries and places you wanted to explore unseen? At best: the dreams you hold today for yourself will still be the visions that they were; at worst: those intentions will be forgotten and empty.

If you are anything like me, you'll appreciate that there comes a time when enough is enough. When it is simply time to be the outstanding person buried inside of you. You may have had some success in the past in achieving sustained levels of confidence and self-esteem by attending courses or visiting health professionals. You may even have resorted to taking antidepressants or other medication to muddle through and manage to function. I know I have done all those things.

Shocked? At my lowest ebb, when I was on my own with my baby girl, she had had an accident that meant constant dressing changes. I had been mentally abused and physically beaten. I was isolated and alone on an acreage, feeling unable to cope. I was chewing over the agony of betrayal and loss. On top of all that, I was being pulled through a senseless lawsuit. I was doing overwhelm big time.

After yet another long, sleepless night, I pulled myself out of bed and was totally disorientated, literally incapable of answering the telephone or making the simplest decision. I could not access the many positive, resilient reference points I had. I knew...