CHAPTER 1
GOD'S PRESENCE IS EVERYTHING
The Christian life is to live all of your life in the presence of God.
— R. C. Sproul, from "Pleasing God"
I was fifteen years of age when I had my first real and personal encounter with God. It was a moment that changed everything as my heart said yes to the golden thread of the Holy Spirit's work of love and mercy in my life. I had sensed the presence of God many times growing up. My grandparents had been in church since they were kids, and they had led our family in the same way, and my parents were involved in serving others through various mission endeavors in my formative years. So, to be around the house of God and the people of God was not new to me. But to encounter Him for myself, one evening at a youth meeting when I asked Jesus to be the center of my world, immediately and radically changed me.
It was during this season, for which I will always be grateful, that the love of God overwhelmed me and wiped the slate of my heart clean. To serve Him completely was my immediate response. I now understand that when I became a Christian, I accepted the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit — all three Persons of God — into my very being. I understood Jesus' sacrifice for me, and I knew that the Holy Spirit had been involved in drawing me to Himself. The Bible tells us that it is the kindness of God that leads us to repentance, and kindness is listed as a fruit of the Spirit, the humbling quality of the Holy Spirit that He used to draw me to Himself. This golden thread of love and mercy has continued to chase me in every season, drawing me back to the Lord over and over again.
A HUNGER FOR MORE
But at the tender age of sixteen, more than a year after I had become a Christian, there was a night at my church when my heart was simply hungry for more of Jesus in my life. I was standing with my youth pastor, who was praying with me and for me. We were asking God to reveal Himself to my heart in a greater dimension than ever before. Suddenly, I found myself speaking in an unknown language, a heavenly language, that was flowing out of my mouth. It was wonderful! But to be honest, as overwhelming as the experience was, it wasn't the only great thing that transpired in my life that evening. That night, I experienced the very real presence of God as never before. Yes, it was wonderful to experience the "unknown tongue," but deep in my soul I encountered an ever-greater revelation of His great love, which I have pursued with eagerness from that day on. Paul's words resonate as I reflect on that experience:
Pursue [this] love [with eagerness, make it your goal], yet earnestly desire and cultivate the spiritual gifts [to be used by believers for the benefit of the church], but especially that you may prophesy [to foretell the future, to speak a new message from God to the people]. For one who speaks in an unknown tongue does not speak to people but to God; for no one understands him or catches his meaning, but by the Spirit he speaks mysteries [secret truths, hidden things]. (1 Corinthians 14:1–2 amp)
Dear friend, please know that the presence of God is not just a theory; it is the reality of the nearness of the Holy Spirit in our midst! I had already had the miraculous experience of being born again, but that evening, I experienced the power of God's Spirit lighting me up from the inside out. Bit by bit since that time I have continued to find that there is so much more spiritually available to us here on earth than we could possibly imagine! The gift of the Holy Spirit's presence in our lives is experienced in billions of diverse ways by people around the world every moment of every day.
That night at my church, my heart, which had been made alive in Christ at the time of my salvation, was suddenly awakened to another dimension. It is hard for me to describe, but everything and everyone I saw from that moment on just looked more beautiful and, over time, I found myself being able to discern the voice of the Holy Spirit for myself. The Bible became like lyrical poetry to me every time I opened it — almost as if the pages I was reading were in fact reading me. It was so scary and powerful all at the same time!
This experience created a real conundrum of faith within my heart. I wanted more and more of the Lord in my life, but that openness to Him forced me to realize He wanted me to leave more and more of my old self, my old nature, behind. As someone who grew up extremely emotionally needy — this refining can be quite challenging. Still, I found myself compelled to become a part of something greater than myself. I was just sixteen years old, living away from home, and yet I was experiencing a new fire in my belly that I can honestly say is the reason I am still standing here today. The way I explain it is that the Holy Spirit had been in me, and now the Holy Spirit was on me! His golden thread of love was weaving itself through the fabric of my life in ways I am still only beginning to understand.
The presence of God is such a wonderful gift in our lives, but it can also be easy to take it for granted. I liken it to having a lamp, all ready to go, but if we never access its power, we will never fully see the light that is available to us and we will never experience its benefits in our lives. God's Presence with us here on the earth is a stunning fact, and the raw and powerful dynamic of His Personhood here with us, in our midst, is something that can be difficult at times for us to grasp, especially in the midst of all that we go through in this world. But His love, His acceptance, His voice, His instruction, His warnings, His compassion — all of Him, the very essence of who He is to us and through us — is here with us in every moment. I have eagerly desired to welcome the Holy Spirit into my life in deepening ways for many years, and it seems that the more I learn, the hungrier I am for more of His presence in my world.
PRACTICING THE PRESENCE
I so enjoy the presence of my husband. I just like to know he is nearby. Even when he is working away quietly, it is a comfort to know he is near. But it's never enough just to live under the same roof with someone you love. You need time to be in the moment together. That's what I began discovering in that singular and remarkable moment when I encountered God's Presence in a powerful and personal way. Yes,...