The author will try to explain and encourage those that are seeking to marry that marriage is a holy estate instituted by God. Marriage was ordained for the life-long companionship, help and comfort which husbands and wives ought to have for each other. The author's deepest focus points are: Life-long Marriage and Finding the Right Mate. Many married couples do not keep the marriage vows they made. Because of that, I recommend marital counseling before marriage. The author does not focus too much on divorce because of his disbelief in divorce. It was Moses that executed the bill of divorce. He did it to protect the women because husbands would divorce their wives for anything just to marry another woman. Women have a moral personality and are not a thing that men may hand over to another, and then take her back again at his pleasure. The author believes there is not law instituting or commanding divorce. Most people use Matthew 19:9, where Jesus was only explaining what Moses meant. The marriage that God wants is a marriage of a life-long commitment; a forever happy home!

Finding The Right Mate

Will You Marry Me?By Gilbert H. Edwards

AuthorHouse

Copyright © 2011 Dr. Gilbert H. Edwards
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4567-2484-9

Contents

Introduction........................................................................................................xiCHAPTER I THE MARRIAGE..............................................................................................1CHAPTER II THE WOMAN................................................................................................9CHAPTER III THE MAN.................................................................................................13CHAPTER IV FINDING YOUR MATE........................................................................................17CHAPTER V WOMEN THAT CAN BE FOUND...................................................................................29CHAPTER VI MEN THAT WOMEN SHOULD REJECT.............................................................................33CHAPTER VII MEN THAT WOMEN CAN SAY YES TO...........................................................................37CHAPTER VIII SOLVING MARRIAGE PROBLEMS..............................................................................41CHAPTER IX THE CONVICTION OF A LIFE-LONG COMMITTMENT AND IT'S APPLICATION TO MARITAL COUNSELING.....................49CHAPTER X THE UNITY BETWEEN HUSBAND AND WIFE........................................................................61CHAPTER XI THE LAWS OF MARRIAGE.....................................................................................75CHAPTER XII MARRIAGES' SPECIAL CONCERNS.............................................................................95Acknowledgements....................................................................................................111

Chapter One

THE MARRIAGE

Marriage is that relationship between man and woman under whose shadow alone there can be true reverence for the mystery, dignity and sacredness of life. Scripture represents marriage not merely as a Mosaic ordinance, but as part of the scheme of creation, intended for all humanity. Its sacredness goes back to the very birth of man.

They do less than justice to this divine institution who views it in no other light than a civil contract. There is a vital difference between a marriage and a contract. In a contract the mutual rights and obligations are the result of an agreement, and their selection and formulation may flow from the momentary whim of the parties. In the marriage relationship, however, such rights and obligations are high above the arbitrary will of both husband and wife; they are determined and imposed by religion as well as the civil law.

In the book of Genesis, we read: "Jehovah God built the rib which he had taken from the man into a woman and brought her to the man. And the man said, "This now is bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh." She shall be called woman, because she was taken out of man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife; and they shall be one flesh" (Genesis 2:22-24). The Lord Jesus Christ also says the same in Matthew; "Have ye not read, that He which made them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, for this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and they twain shall be one flesh. Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh" (Matthew 19:4-6). It is clear from these passages that the woman was created from the man, and that each has an inclination and capability of reuniting themselves into one. That the reunion is unto man (humanity) is also plain from the book of Genesis, where both together are called man (humanity), a male and a female created He them ... and called their name man (humanity)", (Genesis 1:27; 3:22-24) meaning all of mankind.

Marriage love that is truly conjugal arises between a wedded pair who is in such conjunction with the Lord because the above passages clearly prove that marriage is originated by God. From this, it is plain first that love truly conjugal is from the Lord alone and that it is with those who are in conjunction with good and truth from God. Because this conjunction is reciprocal, it is described by the Lord that "they are in Him and He in them" (John 14:20). This conjunction or this marriage was so established from creation; the man was so created that he might be an understanding of truth and the woman that she might be an affection of good, that accordingly, the man might be truth and the woman good. When the understanding of truth is with the man it makes the one with the affection of good, which is the woman; there is a conjunction of the two minds into one. This conjunction is the spiritual marriage from which conjugal love descends; for when two minds are so conjoined that they become as one mind, there is love between them. This love, which is the love of spiritual marriage, when it descends into the body, became the love of natural marriage. This is so of anyone, if he will clearly perceive. A married pair who mutually and reciprocally love each other inwardly, in mind, also mutually and reciprocally love each other as to their bodies. It is known, that all love descends into the body from an affection of the mind; and that without this origin no love exists. When good united to truth flows down from the Lord into a lower sphere it forms a union of minds; when into a still love, it forms a marriage. Actually, conjugal love is therefore a union of minds from good united to truth from God.

Marriage is the conjunction of two in one mind. It shall first be explained what the nature of this conjunction is: the mind consists of two parts, of which one is called "the understanding" and the other "the will." When these two parts act as one, they are called one mind. The husband acts the part, which is called the understanding, and the wife the part, which is, called the will. When this conjunction, which is of the interiors, descends into the lower things that are of their body, it is perceived and felt as love. This love is conjugal love. It is plain from this that conjugal love derives its origin from the conjunction of two in one mind. This is called cohabitation; however, it is said that they are not two, but one. For this reason a married pair are not called two, but one. There is such a conjunction of the husband and wife even in the inmost, who are of their minds, comes from creation itself.

They, who are in love that is truly conjugal, look to what is eternal because there is eternity in that love. Its eternity is from the fact that love increases with the wife and wisdom with the husband to eternity; and in this increase the married pair enter more and more interior into the blessedness of God. They who are in love, that is truly conjugal, look to what is eternal; but if this vanishes from the inmost of their thoughts, they are disunited as to conjugal love. As love that is truly conjugal endures to eternity, it follows that the wife becomes more and more a wife and the husband more and more a husband. The actual reason is that in a marriage of truly conjugal love, each becomes a more and more interior man. For this love opens the interior of their minds and as these are opened, man becomes more and more a man; and in the case of the wife, she becomes more and more a wife, and with the husband, it is to become more and more a husband. The wife becomes more and more a wife as her husband becomes more and more a husband, because it rarely occurs, if ever, that a...