Being and Becoming

Whether prompted by marveling at a photograph of earth from space, or reading theories of modern physics, or even coming to understand the wisdom of ancient traditions, more and more people are recognizing the innate interconnectedness of all things.

Essential Wholeness presents a psychology that reflects the interdependent nature of life. Do you wonder if humanity will survive the suicidal-like destruction of ecosystems, or the threats posed by weapons of mass destruction and terrorism? Western civilization has proven its cleverness to maximize materialistic prosperity in the short-term. However, faced with mass extinctions, erosion and degradation of the soil that feeds us, and a society that is increasingly violent, depressed and addicted, this way of life would appear not to be sustainable, let alone fulfilling.

If we are to create a healthier ecological, sustainable and fulfilling future, it's imperative we discover how to change the ways of thinking that perpetuate problems.

We are rapidly moving from the technological/information age to the biological age. We are learning that to survive and thrive we must honor and harness nature's wisdom and ability to evolve in the face of challenging and diverse circumstances. Should we fail in learning to live harmoniously with nature, we may very well follow in the footsteps of dinosaurs.

To live in harmony with nature, we must live in harmony with our own true natures. If we are to live in peace with one another, we must be at peace within ourselves. It is the role of psychotherapy to help people find this harmony and peace so we can transform our relationships with ourselves, one another and nature.

'You are perfect as you are and you will never be perfect.' Being at peace with now and always becoming more into our full potential. Reality is as it is now and it can never be any different than it is now, yet concurrently everything is always evolving and changing. This paradox is one of the cornerstones of psychotherapy and spiritual development. Some approaches emphasize the ability to change and others emphasize the acceptance of what is; however, they are inextricably linked to one another. The more you accept yourself exactly as you are the more you recognize the ever-changing nature of life. The more you recognize and accept the impermanent nature of existence, the more you become aware of the changeless awareness of being within which everything is experienced. With the recent emphasis on evidence-based psychotherapy, discussions on the role of spirituality within mainstream psychotherapy have been relatively quiet compared to the human potential movement of the sixties and seventies. This is changing with the blossoming of mindfulness-based therapies and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), which draw heavily on Buddhist teachings. Psychology has strived to treat people's suffering by merely treating their symptoms. Whilst this is very important, in the process of doing so it has identified with an allopathic medicine paradigm. As a result, therapists are implored to do whatever is necessary to help a person return to functioning in their life as quickly as possible. A more wholistic approach would help people question the basic assumptions and lifestyles that perpetuate psychological suffering, and then explore an approach to life that is more in harmony with their true nature.

Our true nature may not be suited to the type of life we have been attempting to fit into. Our suffering is a wakeup call on a heroic journey to a more meaningful life, and the life that is trying to emerge will somehow contribute to a better life for others.

An Integration of Approaches

The new wave of approaches integrating mindfulness with proven therapeutic methods has begun to address this inadequacy. There are additional therapeutic methods that can deepen and broaden this integration and help people connect with the essential qualities of being, while trusting more fully in people's ability to change and grow.

There are four basic paths to psychotherapeutic integration. A common factors approach emphasizes therapeutic actions that have been demonstrated to be effective, yet are presented in slightly differently ways in different models. Technical eclecticism looks "to improve our ability to select the best treatment for the person and the problem ... guided primarily by data on what has worked best for others in the past". A third model of theoretical integration focuses on combining and synthesizing a small number of theories at a deep level, whereas others describe the relationship between several therapeutic modalities. With assimilative integration, the clinician has a firm grounding in one system of psychotherapy, yet is willing to incorporate or assimilate perspectives or practices from other schools of thought.

Ken Wilber, in his comprehensive attempt to define an integral psychology, starts with one major rule:

Everybody is right. More specifically, everybody—including me—has some important pieces of truth, and all of those pieces need to be honored, cherished, and included in a more gracious,A spacious, and compassionate embrace ... But every approach, I honestly believe, is essentially true but partial, true but partial, true but partial.

In studying and applying spiritual teachings and psychotherapeutic methods to my own life and through assisting my clients, I have sought to understand what works best with whom and why.

As psychotherapy has evolved, the gap between the field of spiritual enquiry and psychotherapy has narrowed. I feel the gaps exists due to major differences in the contexts in which spiritual enquiry and psychotherapy are set and in the jargon each uses. This book is the result of following the four paths of integration through the learning and application of various psychotherapeutic orientations including: Ericksonian Hypnosis and Psychotherapy, Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP), Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Self Relations Therapy, Solution Focused Therapy, Systemic Family Therapy, Narrative Therapy, Gestalt Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Somatic Psychotherapies, Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), Thought Field Therapy(TFT), NeuroSemantics and Jungian Psychotherapy.

My exploration in the field of psychotherapy has coincided with my journeying through the three schools of Buddhism: Hinayana, Mahayana and Vajrayana. I've been an avid student of A Course in Miracles, been touched deeply by the teachings of Carlos Castaneda, Osho, Adyashanti and, in the Advaita Vedanta tradition, Ramana Maharshi, Gangaji and Eli Jaxon Bear. In addition, when I was young, I was confirmed within the Lutheran Church and served as an altar boy.

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