This book is a must read for anyone who is a procrastinator or who lives with someone who procrastinates. Especially interesting topics addressed include lying, sublimation, ego trips, excuses, mountains out of molehills, and hypocrisy. Anyone who denies being a procrastinator is a liar. From birth, we are all born with this inherent ability. It afflicts stock clerks as well as world leaders. Its most recommendable asset is convenience and accessibility.

CREATIVE RATIONALIZATION

By Abné M. Eisenberg

Trafford Publishing

Copyright © 2012 Abné M. Eisenberg
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4669-7166-0

Contents

Preface............................................................ixChapter One WHO....................................................1Chapter Two WHAT...................................................16Chapter Three WHERE................................................21Chapter Four WHEN..................................................27Chapter Five HOW...................................................33Chapter Six WHY....................................................38Chapter Seven MISTAKES.............................................43Chapter Eight EGO..................................................47Chapter Nine CLEAR ONLY IF KNOWN...................................50Chapter Ten CONTEXT................................................56Chapter Eleven RATIONALIZING.......................................60Chapter Twelve ANATOMY OF LYING....................................64Chapter Thirteen POWER POINTS......................................69Chapter Fourteen JUSTIFIED EXCUSES.................................73Chapter Fifteen MISTRANSLATIONS....................................77Chapter Sixteen HYPOCRICY..........................................83Chapter Seventeen TRUST............................................87Chapter Eighteen PESSIMISM.........................................92Chapter Nineteen YOU'RE RIGHT!.....................................95Chapter Twenty TRUTH...............................................99Chapter Twenty-one COMMITMENT......................................105Chapter Twenty-two MEMORY..........................................108Chapter Twenty-three SUBLIMATION...................................111Chapter Twenty-four MOUNTAINS OUT OF MOLEHILLS.....................114Chapter Twenty-five RULES..........................................117Chapter Twenty-six COLLECTIVE EXCUSES..............................120Chapter Twenty-seven GENDER........................................124Chapter Twenty-eight CROSS-CULTURAL FAUX PAS.......................128Chapter Twenty-nine TRANSCULTURAL IDIOMS...........................134Chapter Thirty SUGGESTED EXCUSES...................................137Afterword..........................................................139Index..............................................................141Addendum...........................................................147

Chapter One

WHO

THE INTRAPERSONAL SELF

If you were asked, "Who are you?" ten times, how would you answer it each time? Whenever possible, try not to simply repeat your last response. Interestingly, your replies will often reveal more about your inner self than you realize. Terms like self-image, self-worth, self-esteem, and self-evaluation are all designed to probe the concept you have of yourself. The perception and conception you have of who you are dictates how you behave. If you think the earth is flat, you stay away from the edge. Psychologists suggest that many people are not comfortable with the way they are mentally and physically. They would like to be taller, slimmer, better looking, healthier, more popular, or more intelligent. Few are completely satisfied with the way they were born.

MASKS YOUR SELF WEARS

We all wear masks. We present ourselves differently to our parents, friends, superiors, authorities, and lovers. Our facial expressions, posture, and gestures are subject to major and minor changes. These behavioral changes are dynamic, not static.

The following anecdote illustrates the use of a mask. There was an eighteen year old girl who lived in the French Quarter in New Orleans. She was not physically attractive and had extremely low self-esteem. As a result, when the yearly Mardi Gras came around, she refused to participate in the celebration. Her father, saddened by his daughter's dilemma, decided to have a beautiful mask designed for her so that she could go to the Mardi Gras without feeling embarrassed. Off she went wearing that beautiful mask. As fate would have it, she met a handsome young man and fell madly in love. However, when the time came to remove their masks, she experienced unbearable fear. She was convinced that once he saw how she actually looked, he would be frightened away. The critical moment came and the young man took off his mask. He was very handsome. After tenderly removing her mask, he said, "You are so beautiful." The moral of this story is that when you are loved, you are always beautiful.

When we look at ourselves in a mirror, what we see often differs from what others see. There are beautiful people who think they are ugly and ugly people who think they are beautiful. The mind is a clever trickster. While plastic surgery can change an individual's external appearance, the inner self is less amenable. Despite this disparity, people continue to wear masks. The cosmetic industry is a conspirator when it comes to altering how people look. Make-up is a form of make-believe, of pretense and deception. Shakespeare's words, "To thine own self be true" should be a constant reminder that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Facial expressions are able to reflect emotions such as anger, sadness, surprise, happiness, fear, and disgust. Although some expressions are universal, many are shared. One facial mask is the smile. It seems to fill the human penchant for bonding.

Smiles are unique. Research indicates that the preference for "pretty faces" is innate. Children born blind make the same facial expressions as sighted children. One hundred sighted infants revealed something interesting in terms of attractiveness. They were presented with two sets of images. One set of attractive faces and one set of unattractive faces. Infants spent 80% of their time looking at the attractive faces.

Masks are clever ploys. They enable disinterested people to look interested and insincere people to look sincere. Sociologist, Erving Goffman, described this mask as, "civil inattention."

There is more to people than their outer appearance. Perhaps, you have had the experience of meeting someone at a social function who was physically unattractive. After a lively and stimulating conversation, you perceived the person to be more attractive. Physical appearances can be mediated by one's intelligence, knowledge, grooming, experience, status, affiliation, and style. No determination of who you are should ever be made solely on how you look.

YOUR EVOLVING SELF

Who you are is not static. As you age, your persona changes. These changes include your pre-natal self, your post-natal self, and your post-mortem self. While there is always a readily identifiable core of who you are, the changes you undergo in a lifetime determine your character and personality.

Believing that people can change produces a safety net, a security blanket. People make minor changes in their life that could be regarded as window dressing. It could be a career change, a mode of dress, or relocating a domicile.

Some changes are easier to make than others. Paraphrasing Vladimir Lenin, "Give me a child for the first five years of its life and he'll be mine." It is those first years that shape the basic SELF people display for their entire life.

Change involves some risk. People tend to avoid change and comfortably recline into the way things are, not the way they would like them to be. Why? Because sameness is predictable, differences are not.

According to Ken Blanchard, a well-known management...