My Nephew's Early Childhood

My nephew as a baby was always a happy baby and very playful. You would have thought that he was my child because we look so much alike and always underneath me. We also bonded. I taught

him his first word which was "uncle". I was amazed by his sharpness and ability to understand me when I spoke to him. It came to point where he could comprehend who I was. Of Course my mother was against this as well as my brother, my nephew's father. I kept teaching the word "uncle" to him until he pointed his finger to me and would say, "Uncle".

I remember one summer afternoon in my mother's living room, I pointed to myself and he said "Uncle". I was ecstatic and very happy but my mother and brother were very furious because they wanted his first words to be "da-da' or 'mom-mom'. My nephew was a very smart child. All that we gave him he was able to put together and use. It was my objective to teach him all that I could and help motivate his brain to think which was very successful. I would buy toys that were educational to stimulate him to grow learn and play. My nephew loved to laugh and have fun with others

Born with a crack addiction since birth, our love overshadowed and my mother focused on adopting him as one of her own. As he grew, his progress was amazing to see a healthy and happy child with no signs of damage that could be seen outwardly. We called my nephew by his nickname because he was named after my brother. The entire family made it our number one purpose to love him. I would take him with me as much as I could.

My nephew and I would go outside and play, go for walk, and to church. When the music would begin to play in the church, he would watch me sing, clap my hands and praise the Lord; he'd smile, clap his hands and praise the Lord too. I was the pastor of the church and he enjoyed being there with me. As he grew he wanted to play drums at church so as I played the organ he would accompany me on the drums. He eventually progressed to playing the keyboard and he played both very well I might add.

My nephew went to public school where he made a lot of friends. He would laugh and crack jokes with all he was around not one for trouble. This is the child I remember. However, people, time and his environment took control and he began to change. His father, my brother and my Mother informed me that they did not want my nephew to go out with me anywhere anymore. The bomb had been dropped. I was devastated and I knew somehow this was the turning point for my nephew.

The Turning Point

My nephew, enjoyed going out with me. He looked forward to me asking him to go with uncle. His father and grandmother did not want or approve of him going to church with me. Although I didn't force him to go with me, when asked to go to church he replied happily "yes I want to go with uncle!". In school, between the ages of five to seven years, he would draw pictures of himself holding the hand of a man and told my nephew would be questioned as to who was in the picture holding his hand, my nephew would say this is my uncle. My nephew response to me during this time was as if I was like a father to him. My nephew was just as destroyed by the actions of his father and grandmother, if not more, than I was. I don't know why he felt this bond with me but as he grew it did not fade quickly.

My mother, my nephew's grandmother, adopted him. I cannot explain why my nephew wanted to go with me or why he felt so close. At this time, I was a pastor of a church in which they did not want him to go. He loved to attend services at the church, play instruments and help in any way he could. Because they have custody of my nephew, I told him that he was always welcome to cone visit me at anytime and stay overnight a couple of days with their permission. He was not happy with this. My nephew told his grandmother, my mom, that he wanted to be a pastor like uncle. She was infuriated and yells at my nephew telling him that she did not want him to be a preacher and was not going to let him although he enjoyed every attribute and aspect of it. He could attend her church but not my church. This began the drifting away. They did not want him to have any part of me because it wasn't them. This is where he strayed from all churches. He no longer had my desire to participate with church and replaced it with the events in the world. When mother could no longer make my nephew go to her church she went by herself while he hung out in the streets. His friends changed, he started cutting class and grades began to suffer. He lost his desire to learn and follow directions and became a behavior problem at home and in school. The biggest turning point would have been one that would not only affect my nephew but the entire family as we knew it. This was the passing of a son, a brother, and a father- my nephew's father-my brother. This was the straw that would break the camel's back of the heavy load it was already carrying. That was a game changer for all of us. My nephew didn't have his father anymore.

The Streets (My Nephew's Family)

At the age of 10, I began to notice disturbing patterns in his attitude, behaviors, and outside activities. Each year seemed to be more intense than the year prior. There were many instances that the police would bring him home describing illegal activity and behavior. My nephew would be punished by me but my mother would take it away. As he grew punishment didn't affect him; not from me nor from his grandmother. This ultimately turned into him ignoring the law and the lives around him. There seemed to be no helping him and my mother just ignored what was happening and all that I was telling her. It soon became apparent that my nephew was going to be a problem. My nephew began to carry a gun and robbed people at gunpoint.

My mother was so consumed with her grandson that she didn't bother to take care of herself months at. During his time in prison, my mother would send designer clothes to him in prison and large amounts of money. During phone calls, promises were made about changing his life around and my mother believed him. These were just a pack of lies. Every time my nephew came out of prison he would never change. He went right back to stealing, drugs and taking all that he could from my mother's house to give in return for the debt he owed. I tried to tell my mother not to take him back but let him learn the hard way because he wouldn't listen to her or me. She didn't want to hear anything I had to say about my nephew. She continued to support him through the years and covered up his wrongdoing.

My nephew was happy living the street life. All that mattered was what he wanted and those he chose to be his friends and family. He didn't care about those who raised and supported him all his life. He did what he wanted to do because he knew that my mother would believe him over every and anyone else. I remember my nephew told me he could get whatever he wanted from grand mom and that is exactly what my mother did. My nephew...