Understanding the Divorce Process

The process of ending a marriage or registered domestic partnership often creates a feeling of utter chaos and a sense of despair. Understanding the process for dissolving such relationships, which is functionally identical for both same and opposite sex, can bring some predictability and, in turn, a sense of comfort. The outcome of many aspects of your divorce may be unknown, increasing your fear and anxiety. But there is one part of your dissolution that does have some measure of predictability, and that is the dissolution process itself.

Most divorces proceed in a step-by-step manner. Despite the uniqueness of your divorce, you can generally count on one phase of the dissolution process following the next. It is also helpful to understand that obtaining a divorce is a process that unfolds over time. Just realizing you are completing stages and moving forward with your divorce can reassure you that the process will eventually come to a conclusion.

It is also important to note at the outset that the emotions of the parties, more than the applicable law, drive much of the divorce process. You are strongly encouraged to apply your intellect and reasoning to the decisions that you make as you proceed, and to refrain from letting the hurt and pain that may follow relationship endings to guide you. Leading with common sense will undoubtedly expedite resolution of your case, and you will look back on this experience as one that you handled with grace.

Developing a basic understanding of the dissolution process will lower your anxiety when your attorney speaks of depositions, motions, and going to trial. The object of this book is to provide you with that understanding, to reduce your frustration with the length of the process, and to increase your awareness of the steps necessary to conclude your matter. These pages will support you in preparing for what comes next. Most importantly, understanding the dissolution process will make your experience easier.

1.1 What steps are taken during the divorce process?

The divorce process in California typically involves the following steps.

If you are initiating the divorce:

• Obtain a referral for a lawyer.

• Schedule an appointment with an attorney.

• Prepare questions and gather necessary documents for an initial consultation.

• Meet for an initial consultation with an attorney.

• Pay the attorney a retainer and sign a retainer agreement.

• Provide requested information and documents to your attorney.

• Take other actions as advised by your attorney, such as opening or closing financial accounts.

• Attorney prepares the summons and petition for dissolution for your review and signature.

• Attorney files the summons and petition with the clerk of the court.

• Attorney serves the summons and petition on the respondent.

• If interim relief (such as temporary child support, spousal support, or attorney fees) is appropriate, attorney prepares motion papers for your review and signature, files with the court, obtains court date, and serves pleadings on respondent.

If you have been served with divorce papers:

• Obtain a referral for a lawyer.

• Schedule an appointment with an attorney.

• Prepare questions and gather necessary documents for an initial consultation.

• Meet for an initial consultation with an attorney.

• Pay the attorney a retainer and sign a retainer agreement.

• Provide requested information and documents to your attorney.

• Take other actions as advised by your attorney, such as opening or closing financial accounts.

• Attorney prepares a response to the summons and petition for your review and signature.

• Attorney files your response with the clerk of the court within thirty days of service of the petition and summons on you.

• If you are served with requests for interim relief, your attorney prepares your response to these moving papers.

After an action has been commenced and the response filed:

• With the assistance of your attorney, you need to prepare financial disclosure documents (income and expense declaration and preliminary schedule of assets and debts).

• Negotiations begin regarding temporary custody and visitation, child and spousal support, payment of community obligations, and attorney fees.

• Attorney prepares moving papers for any requests for temporary relief not previously made.

• If there are minor children, the parties comply with any local rules or court orders to attend parent orientation and to participate in mandatory mediation.

• Court holds hearing(s) held on requests for temporary relief.

• Either the parties reach an agreement or the court issues temporary orders.

• Temporary order is prepared by one attorney, approved as to form by other attorney, and submitted to the judge for signature.

• Both sides conduct discovery — the process designed to obtain information regarding all relevant facts, and commence the process to exchange valuations of all assets, including expert opinions if needed.

• You confer with your attorney to review facts, identify issues, assess strengths and weaknesses of case, review strategy, and develop a settlement proposal.

• Spouses, with the support of their attorneys, attempt to reach agreement through written proposals, mediation, settlement conferences, or other forms of negotiation.

If you reach an agreement on all issues, then:

• One attorney prepares marital settlement agreement and necessary judgment paperwork.

• Both parties and their attorneys sign agreement and all necessary paperwork.

• Judgment paperwork is filed with the court.

• Either the parties waive the court date or the court holds a brief, final hearing.

• Judgment is entered and you will be divorced.

• Your attorney completes necessary orders and supervises the property transfer until all agreed terms are satisfied.

If you are unable to reach an agreement on all issues, then:

• Your attorney completes all necessary discovery to bring the case to its trial-ready point.

• Your attorney files an at-issue memorandum to obtain trial dates.

• If agreement has been reached on any issues, your attorney prepares a stipulation on those issues. All other issues are set...