Parenting in a Digital World

Our children are growing up in a digital world. They are surrounded by technology in their living rooms, classrooms, and playrooms. Their playtime is increasingly dominated by video games, apps, texting, and social media. Sometimes it may seem as if most of their free time is taken up by screen-based technologies, and it definitely feels as if they know more about the digital world than you do. There is no question that kids are learning from their digital-technology play, but what are they learning? How does their immersion in screen-based technologies affect their brains, social relationships, and capacity to problem solve, create, and learn? And what does this mean for parenting in the digital world?

Playing Smarter in a Digital World will help you understand your child's life with technology. Rather than focusing on the many risks and dangers of a digital world, this book will show you how to use game, app, and technology play for teaching the executive-functioning and 21st century skills that are needed for your children's future success. While I will not prescribe a one-size-fits-all strategy for the role that digital media should have in your child's life, this book emphasizes that parents need to be actively involved with and participate in their children's digital world. When you think about it, most thoughtful and supportive parents would choose to be knowledgeable and involved if their children were spending seven to eight hours a day on the newest dance, diet, or yoga craze. Yet these same parents often take a "handsoff" approach to their children's digital-media use. Many children spend as much as seven or eight hours a day on screen time, and harnessing even some of this digital time would provide a tremendous opportunity for learning and skill building. As with any activity, parents need to be informed, know how to set appropriate limits, and perhaps most importantly, find ways to make the most of their children's interests. With these things in mind, we can make children's favorite activities both productive and healthy. This book will help you to achieve these goals.

We still have a great deal to learn about the positive and negative impact of digital media and technology on our children. The first section of this book provides the science and research about "why" parents need to understand the power of digital media for learning. It also stresses the importance of improving children's cognitive and problem-solving skills for the 21st century and how playing with digital tools and technologies contributes to these skills. The second section of the book takes a "how-to" approach that provides practical and specific recommendations for selecting and using games and technologies to help address your children's needs. Throughout the book I use terms such as video games, apps, digital media, screen-based technologies, technology, and digital technologies interchangeably. I also describe the core cognitive, social, problem-solving, communication, collaboration, and self-management skills that are crucial to children's success in future education and vocations. I primarily use two terms when discussing this array of skills: "21st century skills," which comes from the educational arena, and "executive-functioning skills," which comes from my background as a clinical psychologist.

Three major themes are repeated throughout this book. First, "digital play," by which I refer to the use of and engagement with video games, apps, digital media and other technologies, is here to stay and is an authentic form of play. As is the case with other forms of play, we know that digital play can lead to real-world learning. Second, digital play is seen as an opportunity to practice and acquire academic knowledge and the critical-thinking and self-management skills that psychologists refer to as executive functions. However, digital play alone is often inadequate to ensure the transfer of these skills to real-world activities. With proper guidance and direction, children can transfer these skills to real-world activities. This takes us to the third theme, that as screen-based technologies become an increasingly prominent part of children's personal, academic, social, and emotional lives, you will need to be involved with your children's digital play and know how to maximize its beneficial effects. As a parent, educator, or healthcare professional, you need to be knowledgeable and engaged in children's digital play to set appropriate limits and provide supervision. Perhaps more importantly, you will play an important role in assisting children in the transfer of digital learning to real-world activities and you will be helping your child master some of the technological skills that will be vital to 21st century jobs. Digital play is also a potentially very powerful educational tool for children with special needs such as those with Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD); Autism Spectrum Disorder; learning disabilities; and other social, emotional, and learning issues.

Digital Technologies Are Here to Stay

Digital media is not going away. The latest research from the Kaiser Family Foundation in 2010 indicates that children from the ages of 8 to 18 spend an average of 7 hours and 38 minutes each day engaged with digital media. When multitasking (such as listening to music on a cell phone while watching television) is taken into account, the average time increases to 10.5 hours per day of digital-media involvement. These figures have gone up dramatically in the past decade. Media use for children ages 11 to 14 is highest, averaging 8 hours and 40 minutes per day. Total media exposure for this group (including multitasking) is 11 hours and 53 minutes per day.

Media Use Over Time

Among all 8- to 18-year-olds, average amount of time spent with each medium in a typical day:

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There has been a dramatic increase in media use in just 10 years. Most of this is due to Internet access, as not only are computer and online video games more popular, but television content is also now being watched via the Internet on websites such as Hulu and Netflix. Even more startling is that the total media-use time cited in the Kaiser Foundation study does not count the amount of time young people spend texting or talking on the phone. With the proliferation of mobile digital devices, in particular smartphones and tablets, it is...