Relative Grief: Parents and children, sisters and brothers, husbands, wives and partners, grandparents and grandchildren talk about their experience of death and grieving - Softcover

'Death is the elephant in the living room - the huge thing that everyone knows is there but no one mentions... By letting each of the people in this book tell their story in their own way Clare Jenkins and Judy Merry have shown the individuality of grief... The stories show, too, that the dead belong to no one. All we possess are those parts of our own stories which we shared with those we grieve for. Yet, out of all the unique stories in this intensely compassionate and humane book, comes the understanding that, alone as we are in our grief, such suffering shows us that what matters most in life is the love we have for one another.'- from the Foreword by Dorothy Rowe 'This is a book that opens windows onto the raw, honest and very personal accounts of the unique feelings of grief experienced by dozens of people - some you will know and others you won't. Each section, told from the perspective of a different relationship, is thoughtfully introduced and then the feelings and the experiences simply speak for themselves. No textbook can be as eloquent or as helpful as the personal accounts of grief to be found on these pages - an essential book for anyone concerned to look beneath the surface and to try to understand better the experience of others.' - Simon Armson, former Chief Executive of the Samaritans 'Everyone should read this book. Death, real death, that is, has become an undiscussable subject. There is a lot of pretend death in our television, film and cartoon entertainment, but we never really believe it will happen to us and those we love. We don't prepare ourselves properly for the possibility, and when it does happen, don't understand our own feelings which can range, as the authors point out, from obvious sadness to anger and hatred aimed at the very person who died, because we are so upset by it. Clare Jenkins and Judy Merry are to be congratulated warmly for producing a very, very important book indeed. I strongly urge you to read it.'- Claire Rayner

In this collection of first-hand accounts, parents, grandparents, children, siblings and partners share their experiences of losing close relatives and friends through death from natural causes, genetic conditions, accident, suicide and murder. Looking at death from these different perspectives, it aims to encourage people to understand their own grief and how those closest to them might be affected by what can seem a very private loss. The introduction examines the short- and long-term effects of recent and past loss, the duration and intensity of mourning, and the difficult and often conflicting feelings and behaviours that accompany it: loneliness, anger, guilt or relief, the birth - or loss of - religious faith, out-of-character behaviour triggered by shock, and `competitive' grief among close relatives and friends. Relative Grief is of interest to anyone who has been bereaved or supported someone who has. It will also be useful for those working with the bereaved, particularly hospice nurses, social workers, counsellors and therapists.