Early Memories

In the autumn of 1993, I was forty-seven years old, unmarried and living on my own at West Lockinge Farm. I had been training racehorses with a professional licence for four years. I was not looking to share my life with anyone. Yes, challenges lay ahead of me, but I was confident that I could tackle them on my own, with support from my parents and countless wonderful friends. My weeks were extremely busy and I was enjoying my chosen career. I had always wanted to train, even from my early childhood days, when I designed and built model stables in the nursery. I used to have imaginary racehorses even then, and my toy ponies were put to work every morning. I hated dolls.

In the early 1990s my constant companions were three white Labrador dogs. I was devoted to them. On the farm I was surrounded by animals, not only horses and ponies but also geese, ducks and bantams, together with a few pedigree Simmental cattle belonging to my mother: cows, calves and a steady old bull. I was never lonely; my adored parents lived in the same village and I often spent time with them. I was resigned to being a spinster, but it didn't bother me. At that stage of my life, the idea of a husband did not enter my calculations. I had never wanted children of my own. I like them, but I had seen enough of them during my time as a schoolteacher and could never visualise myself pushing a pram.

Despite being a social person, I have always enjoyed independence. Many years ago I spent some good times with men, especially during my travels in Ireland, and I met some special people, a number of whom became great friends. Yet, I never had a proper boyfriend and I never fell in love with anybody. I used to think that having a man living in the house could easily get on my nerves and annoy me. A man might not agree with what I was doing with the horses. He might be a nuisance and take up too much of my time, as well as giving me extra work. No man had ever appealed to me as a likely husband nor had ever asked me to marry him. Perhaps I frightened men off, as I was always ambitious and always making plans for my future. I was not looking to change my lifestyle and I never wanted to leave Lockinge, the village where I had spent so many magical days as a child. It has always been my home and I am deeply attached to the place. It is a huge part of me.

My parents were married for many years and were devoted to each other, but they were often apart due to different commitments. My father, Guy, spent a large part of his early life in the army, was awarded a Military Cross for bravery in the Second World War and finished his career as a maj