If You Could See Me Now: A Chronicle of Identity and Adoption - Softcover

"[A] real bond grew between the adopted child and the man who was not her father but who became her friend. Mewshaw helped Amy patiently and compassionately in spite of his hurts and shortcomings, just as he once helped her mother. There is courage in this exercise, and there is hope. Supported by loving families in the present, these two people went looking for an uncomfortable piece of the past together. Now that they have found it, maybe they both can leave it behind." --The Washington Post "If You Could See Me Now is a work of art and stands shoulder to shoulder with the best memoirs of our age. Mewshaw's career is a pure wonder and If You Could See Me Now is his crowning achievement." --Pat Conroy "Mewshaw's considerable skill as writer lends heart and spirit to his bittersweet chronicle ... Mewshaw shares his memories poignantly and honestly ... The results are powerful, indeed." --Midwest Book Review "[P]oignant...What makes the narrative distinctive is that the storyteller is not a part of the adoption triad (birthparent, adopting parent, and adoptee), yet it still illustrates the difficulties that adoptees face in researching their biological background and in locating birth parents who had been assured of anonymity ... Although true, this story reads like fiction and is hard to put down once started. An excellent addition to all public libraries; highly recommended." --Library Journal

When Michael Mewshaw receives a call from a stranger who says she has reason to believe he is her biological father, Mewshaw realizes he has been half dreading, half hoping for this to happen for over 30 years. Just like the young woman who wants to find the last piece to the puzzle of her life, he hopes to answer questions that have plagued him for decades. But first he has to make sure that she is who she claims to be. In this fascinating memoir, Mewhsaw confronts his own past, the chaos of his family, and complicated memories of the woman he once loved. His unusual role in the baby's birth, her adoption, and, now, her search for her biological parents sets the stage for a revealing personal odyssey that offers a quest for identity and a journey of discovery, an obsession with recapturing the past and righting old wrongs, the constant potential for disappointment balanced against the possibility of redemption. As he finds his old flame and her old lover, rediscovering who he was and who he has become, he finds his life enriched in the process.