WORK, EAT, SLEEP, REPEAT

If you'd driven by me on the freeway in San Diego on this particular Monday morning in February 2017, you probably wouldn't have looked twice: a guy in his midthirties sitting in traffic in a relatively new but unremarkable car, drinking a cold brew from Starbucks. Just another American heading to work.

In fact, there was nothing particularly special about that Monday morning, and I would have lumped it in with a hundred other ordinary Monday mornings that I had spent navigating traffic on my way to work, except that on this particular morning I heard an idea that would change the course of my entire life. An idea that would cause me to quit my job, leave California, and spend a year traveling with my family. To question everything I thought I knew about success, money, and freedom. To find the secret to the American dream, the thing that most people crave but few achieve: the ability to do absolutely anything I wanted.

* * *

This story starts ten years earlier, when I met my wife, Taylor.

From the beginning, Taylor and I were the couple who sought adventure and wanted to live large. New Year's in Vegas? Sure. Last-minute spa trip to Sonoma? Why not! We weren't spending money on flashy watches or designer clothes — but boating on Lake Tahoe? Four-star restaurants? A new snowboard? Flights around the world? Absolutely. We developed an interest in fancy wine and an expensive restaurant habit. When a new restaurant opened, we made sure to try it. If we could meet the chef, even better. Sometimes we ate out three or four times a week.

We joked that our motto was "If we have the money in the bank, go for it." And we did: As hard as we worked to earn money, it all went right back out the door to pay for our good times. That was fine by us. As long as we didn't go into debt, we felt like we were doing life right. Certainly, at times, I would stress about how much money we were spending or how little savings we had. Then I would remind myself that we were young — there was so much time to save in the future! We would hit some big payday, land some huge job, or perhaps sell a business for millions. Eventually, something would surely get us there! Right? We habitually used this "lottery mentality" to feel better about our lack of control.

At the time, I was managing events for one of the largest beer corporations in the world. My job consisted of being flown around the West Coast to support events like the NBA and MLB All-Star games, the Sundance Film Festival, music festivals, and so on. For me, a restless kid who loves adventure and meeting new people, it felt like a dream job. But after a year on the road, the parties and events began to blend together. I started to question the long-term viability of this line of work. I could feel myself craving something more creative and meaningful. I was traveling constantly, barely sleeping, and living an unhealthy lifestyle. I knew I could not keep this up for long. I wanted a life of outdoor adventure, physical activity, and connection. Something that felt more exciting than drinking beer and missing out on quality time with my family.

* * *

After Taylor and I married in 2010, we honeymooned in the island nation of St. Kitts and Nevis. On the flight back, Taylor leaned her head against the airplane seat and said, "Why can't we just live somewhere every day that feels like a vacation?" We were currently living in Reno but we were both ready for a change of scenery. Ten minutes later, we had made a list of "paradise" locales on the back of a drink napkin: St. John in the US Virgin Islands, Kauai, Coronado, Scottsdale, and Key West. After some back-and-forth, in early 2012, we packed up our house in Reno, quit our jobs, and moved to Coronado, California, outside San Diego, hoping to find our endless vacation. We wanted a life that felt enjoyable every day instead of just living for the weekend. We told ourselves we wouldn't be like other people who talk about moving to the beach but never follow through. In retrospect, this atypical move was great training for our FIRE lifestyle to come, but it was also part of our problem.

For the first few years, living in Coronado really did feel like living in paradise. We rented a little one-bedroom apartment near the bay and would stroll the boardwalk to watch the sunset reflect off the beautiful downtown skyline. We bought two beach cruisers and biked everywhere — to the beach, around the city, to meet our friends for drinks after work. It felt like we had the life that everyone dreams of: carefree, outdoorsy, relaxed.

As our love of the outdoors grew, so did our collection of outdoor gear. We bought kayaks, stand-up paddleboards, and surfboards. Then we needed a fleet to carry all our gear, so we bought a Chevy Equinox SUV and a Toyota Prius, complete with sunroofs and roof racks, because — California.

We found loads of career opportunities in San Diego, a city on the rise. Taylor worked for her family's recruiting company and steadily built her market and network. I co-owned a video production company that was eventually acquired, and we moved into a larger marketing agency's office. The cultures didn't quite mesh, and eventually my partners and I decided to move on and start fresh. Doing this meant leaving a large amount of money on the table, but I felt it was the right decision. I have always prioritized my freedom over a paycheck, and I knew that I had the potential to build another successful business. I had developed the skills; I just needed to give myself a chance.

Then we decided to have a baby.

* * *

Our daughter was born in October 2015. It was a perfect California day: sunny, with clear skies and an ocean breeze. We named her Jovie, a reference to the word jovial, because we wanted her to chase joy in her life the same way we were.

Like most first-time parents, we had gone above and beyond in getting ready for Jovie's arrival. We'd moved out of the one-bedroom rental apartment and into a tiny but more accommodating three-bedroom house. Taylor was working from home at this point, and she wanted her own office. Plus, we knew family members would visit to see Jovie, so we wanted a guest bedroom. After weeks of searching, we found a rental house for $2,850 a month, which was a steal in Coronado. We promptly spent another $8,000 furnishing our new home, along with stocking a new nursery with a crib and all the amenities. No cost was spared as we prepared for our new baby.

By this point in our lives, we had recently spent...