Your Kids Are Your Own Fault: A Guide for Raising Responsible Productive Adults: A Guide For Creating Responsible, Productive Adults - Hardcover

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INTRODUCTION

For those of you who are familiar with my work and have readmy other books, you know by now that I am a one-trick pony.This means that there is one central theme in all that I do. Thatcentral theme is personal responsibility. In my first book, ShutUp, Stop Whining & Get a Life: A Kick-Butt Approach to a BetterLife, I emphasized my theme in terms of personal development.In It's Called Work for a Reason! Your Success Is Your Own DamnFault, I exploited my message of personal responsibility in thearea of business. Then I used it again in You're Broke Because YouWant to Be: How to Stop Getting By and Start Getting Ahead in thearea of personal fi nance. I followed that up with The Idiot Factor:The 10 Ways We Sabotage Our Life, Money, and Business. In thatbook, I once more pound home the idea that you must take controlof every area of your life, stop blaming others for your problemsand be willing to do whatever it takes to create the life youwant. Four books with the central theme of personal responsibility.I am back again to harp on that theme, this time in thearea of parenting. Our society is a mess today and will only getworse because parents are not taking responsibility for teachingtheir kids the principles of how to lead successful, productivelives. That trend has to stop and stop now! My intention is toturn that cycle of destruction around in this book.

"I HAVE GREAT KIDS, LARRY. I DON'TNEED THIS BOOK."

I know you have great kids. All kids are great. And if you don'tbelieve it, just ask their parents. Rather than argue that point, Iam going to give in and just say all kids, in the beginning, aregreat kids. Kids come into this world as blank slates that you, theparent, get to write on. Whatever you write on that slate willdetermine whether your great kid will turn into a great adult orwhether he will become a leech on society. So while your kid isa "great kid," that isn't really the point, is it? The real point is toteach your kids to become the best adult version of themselvesthey can be.

IS THIS BOOK FOR YOU?

This book is for the parents who love their kids, want the bestfor them, and are willing to do whatever it takes to turn that kidinto a great adult. Maybe they just need a reminder of what's reallyimportant and that it's time to get back to basics. Or maybethey need a wake-up call so they can turn a bad situation around.Or maybe they need a kick in the pants to tell them they havebeen messing up and they need to get back in control of theirfamily.

This book is for the millions of hardworking parents withnormal situations and regular kids who want to raise these kidsto be responsible adults who will make a good living, be goodpeople who do the right thing and grow up to raise their owngood kids. It is for the single mom and the weekend dad and forthe parents who have solid marriages. It is for parents like thosewho are serious about raising responsible children.

WHAT YOU CAN EXPECT FROM THE BOOK:

In this book I am going to cover exactly what has gone wrongwith parenting and the lack of it and why kids end up the waythey are and act the way they do. I am going to give you many examples of what I consider to be bad parenting and point outthe long-term effects that kind of parenting is having on our society.I am going to talk about what I believe we should teach ourkids so they will grow to be responsible adults. That is my onegoal for every parent: creating responsible, productive adults.

WHAT YOU CAN'T EXPECT FROM THE BOOK:

I am not going to deal with the people who should never havehad kids to begin with. We all know those folks are everywhere!They are on television being arrested for abuse and abandonment.They are running to the sperm bank or getting fertilitytreatments so they can have another eight kids when they can'tafford to take care of the six they already have. Some peopleshould not be allowed to reproduce. I am talking about peoplewho take no interest in their kids and who have no values worthyof passing on. That's all I am going to say about these worthlesswastes of skin. Kids are both a privilege and a responsibility.If you aren't ready for the responsibility, you shouldn't get toexperience the privilege of having them. And if you aren't readyfor the responsibility, try birth control or learn to keep it in yourpants.

I am also not going to deal with any of the extreme issuesthat many parents face, like raising children with mental or physicalchallenges, though most of the parenting principles I amaddressing here would apply to those kids as well. I know thatmany kids have very special needs that require special attention.I am also not addressing child abuse, whether it is sexual, physicalor mental. I don't have the expertise, the credentials or theinclination to write about that.

In fact, this isn't much of a how-to book at all. I am notgoing to talk about how to change diapers or how to get littleJimmy to drink his milk or brush his teeth. I am not going to tellyou how to get little Sally to clean up her room. I am not goingto hold your hand and pass out basic information about everyparenting issue you have already faced or will eventually face. I simply cannot address every situation you are ever going to comeup against, so don't expect me to. Besides, there are plenty ofbooks out there that will teach you all of that basic stuff betterthan I ever could.

Ultimately, how you teach your kids is always going to be upto you, because every kid is different and requires a unique, personalizedapproach. Plus, most parenting lessons can't be plannedin advance. Most lessons are taught on the fly as the situationoccurs. No true how-to can work in those circumstances.This is actually more of a what-to book. I am going to showyou what to teach your kids more than how to teach your kids. Inthe long run, it's what they know that is important. The methodyou use to get that information into their brains is up to you.

"WHAT GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO TEACHPARENTING, LARRY?"

That is a fair question since I am known as either a businessconsultant or a personal development guru or a financial coach.Yet that is exactly what gives me the right to talk about parenting.Besides, I am not really teaching parenting and we need toget that straight from the outset. I am teaching fiscal responsibility,discipline, consequences, goal setting, education, love,charity, ethics, how to work and how to have fun along withmany other principles of a productive life. These are the principlesthat I have taught in every one of my books thus far. Theseare the principles every person must learn and adhere to in orderto lead a successful, happy, financially secure life. These are the"what-to"s I just referred to. All I am doing in this book is offeringthe lessons I am best known for on a level where they canbe taught to children. I am not teaching parenting, I am teachinglife.

In every book I have written, I point to my personal experienceas my right to teach others what to do. I clearly point outwhat I have done wrong in my personal life, my business life, with my money, what consequences I experienced and what I didto overcome the mess I made. I teach the lessons that I learnedthe hard way. I also teach what I have learned from my readingand study on the subject.

This book is no different. I am going to cover what I didwrong as a parent and what I learned from my mistakes. And Iam going to cover what I did right as a parent and the influenceit had on my now adult sons. You will also get the benefit of theresearch I have done by studying the works of many of the world'sleading parenting experts.

But what most gives me the right to talk about parentingcomes down to just two reasons: Aaron Tyler Winget and PatrickMason Winget. Two responsible men who tell the truth, takeresponsibility, work...