According to Jim Mize, nature has no mercy - just a sense of humor - and in this hilarious romp through the woods, he proves why readers praise him as an amusing combination of Marlin Perkins and Lewis Grizzard. The way Jim tells it, such overlooked creatures as fleas, flying squirrels, and chipmunks become curiosities of hilarious proportions.
In the opening section, Jim waxes comic about carnivorous plants, insects that make people nervous, and birds with bad names. He points out, for instance, that all plants are edible. It's just that some of them will kill you. He also notes potential uses for kudzu - erosion control, livestock fodder, and hiding the neighbors' house as a prank while they're on vacation.
From the quirks of nature, Mize graduates to greasy kid stuff. He tells parents how to referee while paddling a boat, raise kids that people like, and survive the two hobbies no child can resist - rock collecting and entomology.
And Jim has plenty of musings about hunting and fishing. Outdoors people are sure to chuckle as he ponders the purpose of carp ("fish so ugly they have to spawn in muddy water"), the perplexities of orienteering ("Getting lost has never been much of a problem for me; the problem is getting found.") and the procedure for getting crappie to bite at night ("Lay your rod down, hold a cup of scalding coffee in one hand and a floppy sandwich in the other, and, if possible, try to balance the open thermos on one leg. Then just wait. Bait is optional.").
Saving some of his most laugh-provoking observations for his final section, Jim answers age-old questions about why women fish better than men, why people give homes to shoe-chewing puppies, and where to take spouses for a special occasion (he recommends steering clear of restaurants that proudly accept Bass Pro Shop credit cards). Jim's entertaining insights are guaranteed to make you laugh out loud in renewed appreciation of the great outdoors.
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Jim Mize writes outdoor humor for three newspaper columns and several magazines, and in the last five years, he has received more than twenty awards from state, regional, and national outdoor writing associations. Jim grew up in Bassett, Virginia, and now lives in Greenville, South Carolina.
According to Jim Mize, nature has no mercy - just a sense of humor - and in this hilarious romp through the woods, he proves why readers praise him as an amusing combination of Marlin Perkins and Lewis Grizzard. The way Jim tells it, such overlooked creatures as fleas, flying squirrels, and chipmunks become curiosities of hilarious proportions. In the opening section, Jim waxes comic about carnivorous plants, insects that make people nervous, and birds with bad names. He points out, for instance, that all plants are edible. It's just that some of them will kill you. He also notes potential uses for kudzu - erosion control, livestock fodder, and hiding the neighbors' house as a prank while they're on vacation. From the quirks of nature, Mize graduates to greasy kid stuff. He tells parents how to referee while paddling a boat, raise kids that people like, and survive the two hobbies no child can resist - rock collecting and entomology. And Jim has plenty of musings about hunting and fishing. Outdoors people are sure to chuckle as he ponders the purpose of carp ("fish so ugly they have to spawn in muddy water"), the perplexities of orienteering ("Getting lost has never been much of a problem for me; the problem is getting found".) and the procedure for getting crappie to bite at night ("Lay your rod down, hold a cup of scalding coffee in one hand and a floppy sandwich in the other, and, if possible, try to balance the open thermos on one leg. Then just wait. Bait is optional".). Saving some of his most laugh-provoking observations for his final section, Jim answers age-old questions about why women fish better than men, why people give homes to shoe-chewing puppies, and where to takespouses for a special occasion (he recommends steering clear of restaurants that proudly accept Bass Pro Shop credit cards). Jim's entertaining insights are guaranteed to make you laugh out loud in renewed appreciation of the great outdoors.
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