Find Your Passion, Spirit, Purpose, and Connection — the DOXA Way

Wake up! Open your senses! Free your eyes, ears, nose, mouth, and fingers to explore the magic of this (and every) moment. It's time to discover your passion and spirit — and let them shape everything you do at home, at school, at work, and everywhere in between.

I want you to love your life, the way I love mine.

Loving my life, with its many tumultuous transitions, wasn't easy or quick. I'm a double immigrant who started from nothing, twice — and had quite the checkered career (you'll hear more about this throughout the book). English is my fourth language. I had to learn how to immerse myself in happiness even when things seemed desperate.

I'd like your journey to be shorter and easier. Let me show you the way, and shortcut the many painful twists and turns I had to take. I'll share with you the many success formulas I struggled to understand through years of trial and error, years of failing and getting up again.

All of us can learn to wire ourselves for success.

Yes, even when life seems like an endless series of unexpected and frightening challenges. We can still choose how to respond, and our choices change the outcome.

My Best Success Secret: The DOXA Method

The best success formulas are simple — because simple formulas are easy to remember and easy to make a part of your life. The DOXA formula, one of my favorites has only four steps:

D – desire

O – outstanding

X – X out the impossible

A – allow you to be YOU

We can put this into practice in every part of our lives — into all life's puzzles, mysteries, and desires. As we focus on these four steps, we transform thought into action and create the life we choose.

You might feel that you have no control over your life — that you didn't choose your situation. And truly, there will be some parts of your life you can't control. But even when he was a slave in a Nazi concentration camp during World War II and had no control over his circumstances, Viktor Frankl refused to relinquish control over the inner person he really was. If he could do it under the worst circumstances a human being can experience, we who live in freedom can certainly do it as well. So yes, you will have unforeseen challenges and complications — but they don't rule you!

Let's start by thinking about all the parts of our life we can control, all the places where our choices make a difference.

For example, we can choose to ...

• Eat healthy, nourishing foods

• Get a good night's sleep

• Exercise our bodies every day

• Hang out with friends who encourage our greatness, not our passivity

• Take steps to achieve a meaningful and well-paying career

The list goes on and on, at every step from infancy to old age. We strengthen our good choices by acting on them. Think about this traditional fable:

An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. "A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy.

"It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego."

He continued, "The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?"

The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

Through the DOXA method, you'll feed the good wolf. You create the kind, gentle, and loving empowerment to ask yourself questions, sift through your responses, let them marinate, and improve your answers through your actions.

You'll find after a while that you get clear answers that you can convert to action — and that you're using both sides of your brain: tapping into both logic and emotion. And it all joins in harmony to create a life you can love.

Choose Authenticity!

My first challenge to you is to live life authentically and genuinely. Authenticity gives you the strength to face those puzzles, mysteries, and desires and come through any obstacles, stronger than ever. Using the DOXA method, that authenticity can transform your thinking. If you've been stuck in fear or negativity, DOXA will help you shift to the positive thinking that embraces and accomplishes your goals. At the same time, you're not a slave to your ego. You recognize that humility will get you to those goals much faster and on far more sure footing than arrogance.

Life is a series of choices. At any moment, we can be asked to choose. Perhaps you're planning a vacation. You'll choose where you'll go, how you'll get there, who's coming with you, what sort of place you'll stay in, and many other decisions.

Someone could ask, "Will you marry me?" If it's someone you have grown to know and love, you'll at least consider saying yes. If it's a stranger in a bar whom you met 15 minutes ago, you'll probably choose no.

But maybe you'd choose to invite that stranger to have coffee and get better acquainted when you're both sober, and two years later, you answer differently when the question comes up again.

With every time we make a choice, our opportunities shift. Some doors open while others close. You may start to regret some of the choices you made, some of the doors that closed. Just remember that 1) other doors opened when you made that choice; 2) sometimes, as in the wedding example above, you can revisit the situation and choose differently; and 3) even if you can't revisit the choice, you have new and exciting possibilities at every moment. Don't let regret be a weight around your neck.

Owning the Choosing Process

When you choose in a conscious way, you own the choosing...