What Kind of Worrier Are You?

That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life.

— Matthew 6:25

Why did I let my mind go there AGAIN?

There I stood, in my kitchen, swiping at the tears rolling down my face. Was I crying about something that had just happened? No. I was sobbing over a horrible mental movie generated in my mind about one of my girls getting into a fatal car accident as she drove to her friend's house.

That movie was so graphic, so real, that I could have won Academy Awards for best actress, best screenplay, and best special effects. I could see the accident scene and myself running and screaming toward a mangled car with hazy smoke rising from the wreck. I could see the EMTs pulling me away from cradling my child as they said, "Ma'am, she's gone. Let her go, ma'am." I could hear my screams in my mind. My heart pounded and tears streamed down my face. Why does this feel so real, even though it's only in my mind?

Then I'd snap back to reality. I was worn out. I felt guilty and foolish. Guilty because I'd imagined something that really has happened to others but not to me. Foolish because I should know better. C'mon, Barb! You've made yourself upset over something that wasn't even real.

By definition, the word worry means "to torment one's self with or suffer from disturbing thoughts." Have you ever found yourself watching a mental movie about an imaginary tragic event in your life, yet you couldn't stop watching even though it made you cry real tears? Almost every single one of us has spent time worrying about the bad things that could happen — whether they involve our families, our jobs, our finances, our health, or our futures.

Lately, it feels as though our world has gone a little cuckoo. A few minutes on social media brings on heart flutters for some and an outright freak-out for others. Have you ever spent a sleepless night worrying about the state of our nation or world? You aren't alone. If I had a dime for every time I've worried about something in my life, I might be tempted to start worrying about where to store all those dimes!

Take a moment to engage in a quick "temperature check" on your current level of worry. On a scale of 1 to 5, how much worry are you experiencing in your life right now?

1. No worries

2. Just a few

3. More than a few

4. Mind is racing

5. Overwhelmed with a lot of worries

For much of my teen years, through my thirties, I hovered between a 4 and a 5. I felt like a bad Christian because I struggled so hard with worry. Why did "just pray about it" not work for me? I did pray about it, but I still worried! While there were some women who said that they were "too blessed to be stressed," I was a five-foot-ten ball of stress all the time! Why couldn't I just give my worries to God and let them go? Was there something wrong with my faith?

Perhaps that kind of uncomfortable honesty is difficult for you to hear. But I want to believe that a few of you have let out a relieved sigh instead. You aren't alone in the battle against worry. You've tried to push back against it, and yet it keeps pulling you in anyway. That push-pull, back-and-forth battle is exhausting, as you first try to resist worry and then realize how it feels after worry has whipped you around a bit.

I get it. I've lived it. Yet God has shown me how to wake up each day and claim victory over any worry that comes my way. I'd love to tell you more about how you can claim God's victory too.

Do you know how much time you spend worrying? One study quantified that even people not diagnosed with a specific anxiety disorder spent 55 minutes every day worrying about something. Since there are 1,440 minutes per day, that might not seem like much. However, the time you spend fretting, freaking, or flipping out really adds up. Let's look at how many minutes you might have already spent worrying in your life if you're "normal."

If you are 20 years old, you've spent up to 401,500 minutes worrying.

If you are 30 years old, you've spent up to 602,250 minutes worrying.

If you are 40 years old, you've spent up to 803,000 minutes worrying.

If you are 50 years old, you've spent up to 1,003,750 minutes worrying.

If you are 60 years old, you've spent up to 1,204,500 minutes worrying.

If you are 70 years old, you've spent up to 1,405,250 minutes worrying.

Here's where I'm going to geek out on you a little more: Did you know that forty million adults in the United States are affected by an anxiety disorder? If you're struggling with anxiety or worry, whether it's been diagnosed or not, you are not alone!

This means that one in five adults deals with an anxiety disorder that interferes with their daily lives. Imagine that one of those adults lives in your house. Maybe you grew up in a home with one parent who struggled with worry and anxiety or had a grandparent, aunt, or uncle struggling with worry. Here are some examples that might sound familiar:

You miss curfew by fifteen minutes, and when you come home, your mom screams and yells at you for an hour because she just knew that you were dead in a ditch because you didn't call.

Your dad flips out if you leave the lights on or ruin a piece of clothing because he worries all of the time about money.

Your grandmother leaves messages on your cell phone each day to make sure you didn't get kidnapped on your way home from your part-time job at the mall.

Perhaps you are the one in five. How many times have you said, "I'm so sorry for flipping out on you guys" because you freaked out about something? If you want to be a better influence around your friends, spouse, or kids, then fighting your worry battle may be the best gift you can give the people around you. Ask yourself: Do I want my kids to grow up and handle worry like I'm handling it now? Or What can I learn so that I can teach the people around me how to handle worry in a healthy, God-honoring way?

Mental health professionals tell us that worrying is normal. And since research seems to indicate that everyone worries, we need to be aware and seek treatment if our normal worry becomes excessive. Unlike taking your temperature to find out if you have a fever, there isn't an objective test for worry, but there are inventories, like the Penn State Worry Questionnaire, to help you determine how much worry is interfering with your life. Maybe you've been to the doctor or another mental health professional and he or she used...