CHAPTER 1

Can I Be Your Coach?

Take a few more minutes to look inside yourself and react to this questionbefore you answer it. Your degree of acceptance will significantly affectour journey together. Before answering, I will tell you what the word"coach" means to me: a coach is a leader who is committed to servingthe team and the individuals on the team. A coach has the responsibilityto create an environment that will allow each team member to growand develop to his or her greatest level of potential. In other words, acoach exists only to provide an environment for all team members tomeet their personal goals while helping the team reach its goals andobjectives.

If you agree to let me be your coach, expect to learn how to win on allof your teams, expect to become an Even Better parent or grandparent,expect to become an Even Better leader with all of your teams. Don'tworry, there won't be any push-ups or running laps. So what about it?Can I be your coach? I am asking you to make a commitment to me asyour coach and to your own life, a commitment to learn how you canbecome Even Better in all of your relationships. Once a commitment ismade, the process of change will begin.

About Commitment

Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance todraw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all actsof initiative (and creation) there is one elementary truth,the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendidplans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, thenProvidence moves too. A whole stream of events issues fromthe decision, raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseenincidents, meetings and material assistance, which no mancould have dreamt would have come his way. I learned adeep respect for one of Goethe's couplets:

Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it.Boldness has genius, power and magic in it!

—W. H. Murray

If you are still with me, then you have made a commitment toyourself and to me as your coach to explore your opportunities foradditional growth and development, to create an Even Better life foryourself and those you come in contact with. We have establishedthat you like to win and that you have agreed to be coached by me.Fantastic!

My next question is, are you coachable?

Are You Coachable?

What does being coachable mean to you? As you think about youranswer, let's explore together what being coachable means to me. WhenI think of being coachable, I think of the following characteristics:enthusiasm, excitement, commitment, the willingness to change,the willingness to listen, the desire to learn and grow, and finally theunyielding desire to improve, to become Even Better at everything youdo.

Are you coachable? A good place for you to find this answer is tobecome aware of how you are receiving this information. How are youlistening? Are you open to learn? Are you critical? Cynical? Accepting?Bored? Excited? Your answers to these questions will help you todetermine if you are really coachable.

I will be asking you many questions throughout our journeytogether. When I have a question for you, or you have a question aboutwhat you are reading, stop reading and take a few minutes to reflect andanswer these questions for yourself. I encourage you to read this bookand to live your life constantly asking "Why" and "How" questions.

Listening

Being willing to listen is an essential part of being coachable. (Eventhough you are reading, your response to what you read is a form oflistening.)

Listening can mean many different things. Growing up, I wastaught to listen to what I was told, to keep my mouth shut, and to lookinto the eyes of the person who was talking. Even though I did thesethings, there were many occasions that I learned very little because Iwas not listening with an open mind.

Become aware of how you listen; are you open to consider that whatyou are reading (listening to) is possible? Are you willing to considerthe possibility that what you read might work for you and maybe evenchange your life? At the very least, ask yourself, "What if I can becomean Even Better leader or parent?"

If you are closed to an idea, and you have already made a decision,there is no real listening. Without listening, there is no learning, andwithout considering the possibility that you may learn something bylistening, you are not coachable. What's going on in your mind rightnow? Are you still coachable? Are you still open to possibility? Are youwilling to consider that Even Better! can actually change your life?

We all can become Even Better listeners when we make a consciouseffort to become aware of how we really listen. We can discover if we areclosing our mind to what we are hearing because we don't like a person'sage, race, nationality, sex, or even political views.

All humans have what I call "built-in" listening. We will listen tosomeone based on what we feel we will gain from listening. What wouldhappen if I told you that in this book, I will tell you how to becomean instant millionaire? How would you listen to me then? Would youcasually glance through the next few pages at your leisure, or wouldyou commit every ounce of your energy to discover what I would sharewith you? How we listen is tied directly to what we feel we will gainfrom listening. This isn't good and it isn't bad—it is simply part ofbeing human. My coaching suggestion: listen to everything as if youwill learn something that will change your life, and be open to learnfrom...