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WOW, Your Mom Really Is CRAZY

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Contents

Introduction...................................................................viiChapter 1 Stress, the Bad Kind................................................1Chapter 2 My Stress, The Pit..................................................13Chapter 2—The Continuation...............................................27Chapter 3 Finally, Treatment!.................................................36Intermission & Chapter 4 Preview...............................................50Chapter 4 Nutrition...........................................................53Chapter 4—The Sequel.....................................................76Chapter 5 Family and Friends..................................................90Chapter 5—The Next Generation............................................100Chapter 6 Cautionary Tales, Take Care of You..................................104Chapter 7 The Twelve Steps for the Thyroid Sufferer...........................109Chapter 8 Crazy Thyroid Lady's Quick Guide and Other Tips.....................119The Final Scene................................................................131Resource Page..................................................................133References.....................................................................135

Chapter One

I want you to close your eyes and try to go back in time to remember a specific event in your life. Now, I know this is asking an awful lot of you, my thyroid-deficient friend. No one knows more than I do how difficult it is to conjure up memories. But I would venture to guess that the particular memory I am going to ask you to reflect on is probably still very strong because it relates to that spiteful, sinister substance that can strengthen any sickness: stress. What was the major stressor that helped jump-start your thyroid disease? I am quite sure this six-letter word kicked my butt to thyroid Hades.

Unquestionably, the medical community has given stress more respect in recent years, reporting that stress can intensify illnesses and, in some cases, kill. Just ask a cardiologist what stress can do. If this fact is recognized by so many, why do we ignore and/ or accept continuous stressful situations in our lives? Being the inquisitive person that I am, I began to analyze this phenomenon. I interviewed others to get their opinions about stress, watched documentaries, read articles, and so on. Then I checked to see what Mr. Webster had to say. Ugh! The dictionary's numerous definitions stressed me out. There are fourteen different definitions for the word stress. Weeding through all of those definitions—and then trying to decipher which one best fits the classification of something that could result in death or disease—caused me to do what I do best after a stressful situation: take a nap.

If my thyroid hormone levels are up or down either way, and I am faced with too many choices, I find myself heading down Berserk Boulevard. This is why we should continuously have our thyroid levels checked every three months (or sooner, if your doctor recommends it). So many of the non-thyroid afflicted, do not understand how difficult it is for us to make the right decision or any decisions at all, for that matter. To illustrate, it is like your brain is inside that head of yours, anxiously working away, literally trying to seek out a needle in a haystack. Once it finds the needle, the brain starts celebrating—"Yippee! Here it is!"—but the process was long and arduous. At my sickest, this simple question was like trying to locate that needle: "Ma'am, do you want paper or plastic?"

Before my thyroid diagnosis, I could never understand why that question from the store clerk would send me close to the edge. I knew making that decision was not rocket science, but it gave me trouble nonetheless. Every time! Somehow it didn't dawn on me that this question would be asked during every purchasing event. And understanding how simple a question it was, but also knowing that it caused so much deliberation, would perpetuate a dizzying effect. If only they would give me the chance to sit down for a minute in the checkout aisle and contemplate which one I really needed ... paper or plastic, I would say to myself. Ha! Perhaps they should have a separate checkout lane for us, "Lane 2: The Thyroid Lane."

When the thyroid goes all wonky, so can the brain—and vice versa, I guess—because the thyroid and the brain are tight coworkers. After diagnosis and treatment, I continued to have problems with working through multiple choices. This was mainly because a thyroid that is not fully functioning does not give a person the essential nutrients needed for ample brain and body performance. Also, it is difficult for doctors to dial in the correct thyroid medication dosage to mimic a healthy functioning thyroid. So while doctors try to figure out how to reign in my rogue thyroid and immune disorder, I use my MacGraver tricks (for example, naps) to keep all my symptoms at a dull roar.

Two hours after my dictionary-induced nap, I woke up refreshed and ready for more stress education. I isolated the definitions with which most of us are familiar and that negatively affect us. Whew!

Here's my abridged version: whatever causes pain, fear, emotional strain, or tension, both physical and mental, is stress.

As much harm as stress can do to the human body, I really wanted good ol' Mr. Webster's first description, out of all fourteen, to say the following: "Stress is evil; do something about it. Grab it by the you-know-what, or you will be sorry. Sickness and disease will take over your life." This would have warranted a "Yea!" and a fist pump—and no nap.

The American Psychological Association reported in 2009 that 66 percent of surveyed adults had been told by their doctors that they have one or more chronic stress-related conditions (helpingpsychology.com, 2010). I believe most of us autoimmune disease sufferers would agree that stress was the main trigger that initiated our diseases. Stress is the kerosene thrown on smoldering coals that creates an inferno. Medical experts have often said that the daily personal anxieties we endure affect our dynamic trio: mind, body, and soul. Hey, think about this: your trio is not the only thing affected by stress; others in your path are affected as well because stress can be the gift that keeps on giving. Most of us aren't that skillful at maintaining calmness during highly stressful situations. We freely involve everyone—and who knows, maybe this contributes to the large number of chronic illnesses in our society. Wow, we all make each other sick. Isn't that great? Am I wrong? Look at my example below:

Hypothetical Example:

Pretend that stress is measured in pounds.

Your stressed-out friend calls you around 10:00 p.m., crying about a traumatic event going on in her life (three pounds). You listen intently, trying to be the good friend that you are, but your face tells a different story. You are rolling your eyes because this is the twentieth time she has been in this situation throughout your friendship. (It isn't necessary for me to detail the friend's circumstances in this hypothetical; you can insert your...