Über die Autorin bzw. den Autor

Channelle Lewis is a woman who has been through a lot in her life. As a former foster child, domestic violence survivor and social worker, she speaks frequently about overcoming her past. She currently lives in Georgia with her eight children and three dogs.

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I Survived! You Can Too!

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Contents

Chapter 1. Daunting Beginnings.....................................1Chapter 2. Life's Challenges.......................................5Chapter 3. School Aged Now: Misunderstood..........................11Chapter 4. Family Matters..........................................15Chapter 5. What Else Could Go Wrong?...............................23Chapter 6. Broken Childhood........................................27Chapter 7. Endurance...............................................34Chapter 8. Back Home...............................................42Chapter 9. Almost Snapped..........................................47Chapter 10. Foster Care Again.......................................51Chapter 11. Forgiveness.............................................64Chapter 12. From Placement To Placement.............................67Chapter 13. Good Foster Parent; Bad Environment.....................75Chapter 14. Moving Again............................................77Chapter 15. On My Own...............................................85Chapter 16. Forever Changed.........................................89Chapter 17. Precious Loss...........................................95Chapter 18. Moving On...............................................99Chapter 19. Homeless................................................103Chapter 20. On Track with a Curve...................................107Chapter 21. Red Flags...............................................112Chapter 22. I'm A Mom Now...........................................118Chapter 23. Blinded By Love.........................................123Chapter 24. College Graduate Holding On.............................133Chapter 25. More Excuses............................................142Chapter 26. Finally, I Woke Up......................................148Chapter 27. New Beginnings..........................................159Epilogue............................................................163About the Author....................................................169Recognition.........................................................171A Special Dedication................................................173

Chapter One

My first childhood memory was when I was about three-years-old. We lived on the Campus of the University of Illinois, in a family housing complex called Orchard Downs. I was awaken by the sound of my bowling pins (I had a toy bowling set that I loved to play with, which was kept on top of the dryer), falling to the floor.

As I got out of bed, I saw my father choking my mother. I stood there as mother was crying and choking, trying to breath, watching my father do this to her. At the moment that my father noticed me standing there, he stopped choking my mother. She then ran out of the room. I remember that we lived on the third floor of the apartment complex. My mother looked so scared of my father.

The next thing that I saw was my mother opening the balcony glass sliding door and then she was gone. What I didn't realize, was that she had jumped off the third floor balcony because she was in fear of her life.

At the time, I didn't understand what I had just witnessed. Within the next two years of my life, I would come to understand that what I witnessed between my mother and father would not compare to other experiences that my young life would endure.

My parents were married in 1971. My father was in the Army at the time and my mother was madly in love with him. Together they had two children. My sister, Latricia Michelle (she goes by Michelle), was born one year after my parents were married.

At the time of Michelle's birth, my parents lived on the Marine Corps Base at Camp Lejeune, North Carolina. Before my birth, my parents would move back to Champaign, Illinois where they are both from. This is where my life would begin.

On February 2, 1974, I was born into this world. I was the second and last child born to my parents. I was always reminded that I was supposed to be the child who "saved the marriage." This didn't work. I learned over the years that, from the beginning of my parent's relationship, my father was a very abusive man to my mom. On top of this, he was a very unfaithful man too. It would take me years of growing up to understand just why my mother stayed with him.

Within a couple of years after I was born, between getting beat up and watching the man that you love not only sleep with other women but also get them pregnant, my mother finally had enough and filed for a divorce from my father. Once the divorce was final, years would past before I was old enough to understand that my mother was never really over him.

My Family

Whenever I talk about my family, I am referencing the maternal-side of my family. I was only raised around my mother's family and they are all that I know. My grandmother, Maline Robinson, (who everyone called "Big Mama") had four biological children; three daughters and one son. She also raised her two step-sons.

My grandfather died when I was four-years old and I have no memory of him at all.

My mother was the youngest of all of the children and she was also a "change of life baby." My grandmother was thirty-nine-years-old when my mother was born. From what I have been told, my mother always got her way. This would become a problem for my mother later on in life.

Growing up, I was really close to my aunt Geneva. She was oldest out of all my aunts and uncles. She was also a piece-maker in the family.

In our family, there was also an older adult cousin named Charles. He was my mother's first cousin and a good twenty years older than her. He is also the person who started the almost 'fatal destruction' of my life.

Childhood Memories

When I was around four-years-old, my mother started "going out" a lot. Every Friday and Saturday night, my mother would go out to have fun. Since she had married young, I guess she never really had time to have adult fun. Looking back, I believe that this was also her "let out" trying to get my father "out of her system."

Michelle and I spent a lot of time at Big Mama's house, which was ok because we loved Big Mama. She was always trying to teach us new things like how to make different things. My mom would usually pick me and Michelle up late in the night to go home.

I remember one night, my mom picking us up from Big Mama's house when she lived in Burch Village and me, my mom and Michelle arriving home. At the time, we lived in Garden Hills on Hedge Road. (I bring this up as a reminder that even as a four-year-old child, I remember everything and children need to be protected from violence).

After we arrived home in the wee hours of the morning, in our dark bedroom, Michelle noticed that our box with our stuff animals in it had been opened. Within seconds of seeing this, my mother ran into our room, grabbed me and Michelle and ran outside with us.

After this happened, as we sat in a cold car, I saw the police come to the house and then saw my father led out of the house. Apparently, he had seen my mother out at a bar and got very jealous and broke into our home to hurt her. This would be the last time for a while that I would see my father. This episode didn't however stop my mother from going out on Friday and Saturday...