THE FIRST TRIMESTER: NERVOUS EXCITEMENT

You're Pregnant, Now What

Few things are as profound as looking down at a pregnancy test and seeing that second line slowly appear, and any emotional response you have to big news like this is completely acceptable. You might feel shock, glee, fear, deep satisfaction, relief, panic, incredible joy. You might shriek. You might cry. You might shout a joyful expletive. You might cuss in despair. You might just stare mutely in disbelief.

Maybe you've been trying for a long time and are used to seeing a blank space where that faint marker now appears. Maybe you just started trying and didn't expect to hit the jackpot right away. Or maybe you weren't trying at all and the news is not only unexpected but maybe not even welcomed. You may cycle through ten different emotions as your mind works to wrap itself around the news. Allow yourself to feel whatever comes up for you, and don't judge yourself for it. You're human. This is big news. However you respond is okay.

GIVE YOURSELF TIME TO LET THE NEWS — AND FEELINGS — SINK IN

However you feel as you consider what you have ahead of you, take time for yourself to settle into this new experience. Soon enough you will be swept into planning and decision-making. Take this time to celebrate. If the news arrives to mixed emotions, take some time to see what comes up for you. Maybe write down what you are feeling, or find a friend you can say anything to and tell her everything that comes to mind. Put it all out there. Take a look at what you're feeling and sit with those emotions. If this information represents an abrupt change of plans, give yourself the space to grapple with how you feel and how you want to move forward.

The bottom line is that no matter how you came to those two lines, many different experiences and choices will flow from it. Take as long as you need to sit with the news and see how the news sits with you. Learning to take a pause in the face of what may feel like impending chaos is a skill that will serve you throughout motherhood. Take a moment for you.

When you're ready, read on for guidance on managing the unexpected emotions of pregnancy, weathering the anxieties of the first trimester and beyond, strengthening your relationship with your partner, and learning how you can begin to take care of yourself now so you know how to do it well when your world changes.

Been There, Done That: Moms Share the Feelings They Had When They Found Out They Were Pregnant

Panic. Shock. For the first time in my life, I felt like, "I can't control this journey at all. I'm on the roller coaster now, just hold tight."

— Rachel, London, UK

Absolute joy. It was a difficult journey trying to get pregnant.

— Erica, State College, Pennsylvania

I was excited and terrified. Then I realized I'd have to actually give birth and had a panic attack.

— Becky, Decatur, Georgia

I was terrified, and I felt guilty for not wanting to be pregnant. So many of my friends were trying for babies, but we, who had never wanted children of our own, had accidentally gotten pregnant.

— Emily T.

Terrified, elated, and everything in between.

— Alexis, Saint Paul, Minnesota

I was happy, but also pretty confused by it. I felt pretty aware I didn't actually know yet what was happening or how my life was going to change.

— Laurel, Atlanta, Georgia

It's Natural to Worry: Anxiety in Early Pregnancy

Pregnancy launches you into the responsibility of parenthood — caring for another human life, and that is going to be scary at times (okay, maybe a lot of the time). Worrying will come with the territory, and one of the first places you may feel that concern is over miscarriage.

The reality is that as many as one in four pregnancies end in miscarriage. So it makes sense that women in the early weeks of pregnancy often spend some (or a lot of) time worrying about it. In fact, with technology to detect pregnancies before we even miss a period, we are learning we are pregnant earlier than ever and spending a longer period of time in a kind of early pregnancy limbo.

"We are born with millions and millions of eggs, which means that some won't be able to develop into full pregnancy, and our bodies know what to do with them," says Lauren Abrams, CNM, director of midwifery at Mount Sinai Hospital in Manhattan. "It can be devastating emotionally, but it's not abnormal and, in most cases, does not in any way mean you won't carry a pregnancy to full term." But waiting out those first seven to eight...