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Erin MacPherson is a mom of three who never does anything halfway. When she discovered she was pregnant she decided to write about it―but then kept writing. A former staff writer and editor for Nickelodeon, Erin now entertains parents on her personal blog as well as through freelance magazine articles, devotionals and speaking. She wants to come beside her readers not only as a confidant and Christian sister, but also as a best girlfriend who understands what daily life is all about.

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THE CHRISTIAN MAMA'S GUIDE TO BABY'S FIRST YEAR

THOMAS NELSON

Contents

Acknowledgments.........................................................xiIntroduction: Welcome to Club Mom.......................................xiiiOne: Getting into the New Mama Groove...................................1Two: The Christian Mama's Lying-In Period...............................11Three: Newborns 101.....................................................35Four: Lovin' Your Lil' Night Owl........................................47Five: Breast Assured....................................................65Six: To the Bottle and Beyond...........................................85Seven: Diapers and Wipers...............................................95Eight: Gearing Up.......................................................109Nine: Medical Helpline..................................................117Ten: It's Playtime......................................................131Eleven: Out On the Town.................................................143Twelve: Solid Advice....................................................155Thirteen: Taking Care of You, You, You..................................171Fourteen: Baby Weight Boot Camp.........................................185Fifteen: The Christian Daddy's Guide to Babies..........................195Sixteen: The Help-Daddy-Bond Initiative.................................205Epilogue: A Sappy Dissertation from a Toddler's Mom.....................217About the Author........................................................219Index...................................................................221

Chapter One

Surviving and Thriving as a New Mom

Being a new mom isn't as easy as it looks. I remember going to the grocery store when my son was a few months old and standing in line behind a woman who had three kids. She stood there, thumbing through a magazine, with her baby sleeping peacefully in a sling while her two older (and perfectly behaved) children sat quietly in the cart and quizzed each other on phonics. Phonics. No joke! And to top it all off, the woman was wearing real pants (not sweats), and I think I spotted a smidgen of mascara on her eyelashes. My jaw dropped in awe. How did she do that?

Meanwhile I stood there wearing a ratty, spit-up–covered T-shirt, my hair in a greasy ponytail, bouncing up and down in line while singing "Jesus Loves Me," to try to make my son stop screaming so I could at least make it through the checkout line and buy milk. And I wondered how I was ever going to be able to do normal things—like go to the grocery store or (gasp!) have a social life—without enduring a total meltdown (both the baby's and mine).

Being a mom is hard. Way back in the 1960s, two psychologists named Holmes and Rah decided to study the link between major life events and stress. They did a bunch of research and interviewed a ton of people and came to the startling conclusion that major life changes—you know, like having a baby—are stressful. Um, well, duh.

Of course having a new baby is stressful! In a matter of minutes, you go from a fashionable, intelligent, and totally (okay, mostly) put-together woman to a blubbering, still-trying-to-lose-the-baby-weight mother who is exhausted, overwhelmed, and trying to figure out how to use the nasal aspirator. It's a huge life change—and most mamas (like me!) need some time to get the hang of it.

But you'll get there. Okay, so chances are you'll probably never stand in line at the grocery store while your kid discusses the intricacies of phonics, but you'll certainly get to the point where you can manage to put on real pants and buy milk without feeling like a bumbling fool. I promise.

How to Get into the New Mom Groove

1. Give yourself a break.

Remember that seemingly perfect mom I told you about earlier in the chapter? The one who managed to wear pants and mascara while wrangling three kids? Well, fabulous as she is, you have to remember that she has three kids ... which means she's had a lot of practice. I'm willing to bet that there was a point in time when she also stood in the grocery store with a screaming baby in her arms while covered in spit-up from head to toe.

You're not going to have the mom thing down pat right away—or ever. Case in point: We flew from Texas to Oregon right around my son's first birthday. With a full year's experience of being a mom under my belt, I had everything under control. Or so I thought. Right after we got on the plane, I realized that my son had a dirty diaper—and of course, in the process of trying to change it on the cramped plane, I managed to completely soil his pants, his shirt, and his sweater. I reached for the diaper bag—only to realize that I had checked it. I had nothing. Well, nothing except for a naked baby on an airplane in December.

Every mom has a story like that—well, maybe not exactly like that, but I'm pretty sure every mom forgets to bring a change of clothes once or twice. And when things happen that make us look inexperienced or clueless or just plain frazzled, we have to take it in stride. Realize we're doing the best we can. And confidently ask everyone around us if we can please borrow a diaper.

2. Give yourself a break from baby.

You heard me. If you're going to stay sane, you need to pry yourself away from your little schnookums every once in a while. I'm not telling you to go away on a four-week African safari, but it certainly wouldn't hurt you to sneak out of the room while your baby is sleeping and take a shower. Or if you're feeling really brave, you could leave your baby with your mom and go out to the Tastee Freez with your husband.

The point is that as wonderful as your baby is, you need some time to be you. And seeing as how you weren't always a brand-new mom with a brand-new baby attached to your hip, it's good for you to pry that baby off your hip every once in a while and go back to being your fabulous self—give or take ten to fifteen pounds.

When my son was a few weeks old, my husband suggested (okay, demanded) that I leave the baby with him and go to the mall with my sister. I whined and moaned and worried that something would happen. But I eventually left. And we had a great time. We were only gone an hour or two (I was breast-feeding), but I remember feeling so liberated walking around carrying just my purse. I felt like a real person again!

3. Pace yourself.

When you have a new baby in tow, there is no way you can do all the things you used to do back in the day. That's fine. It's okay that the house only gets vacuumed when your mother-in-law comes or that an entire day's worth of activities constitutes a run to Target to buy diapers. Yes, you headed up the world committee on organic gardening while holding down a full-time job and a seventy-hour-per-week volunteer ministry in your pre-baby days, but you just aren't going to be able to do that now that you have kids. And that's okay.

The good news is that you'll get back into your do-everything-and -volunteer-at-the-soup-kitchen-to-boot groove soon enough. I remember feeling so incompetent when my son was a newborn. I felt as if nothing got accomplished at my house. Ever. But you know what? My son didn't stay a newborn and I didn't stay a newborn mom...