Introduction

Bigot. Hater. Intolerant. Christian.

Christians were rarely labeled that way when I was growing up. We sure are today. The gay marriage movement has branded Christianity with that image, they've branded you and me with it, and, worst of all, they've stuck those labels on our Christian sons and daughters. To be a committed, believing Christian in today's world, especially the world our youth live in, is to be considered an intolerant bigot.

On television, in the classrooms, in political debates, in music and film, and all over the Internet, the message is relentlessly repeated: If you're a Christian, you're a hater. Christian young people have too few places of refuge from that cutting criticism. They can't help wondering, If that's what it means to be a Christian, do I want it?

Many teens answer that question with a no. Although survey results differ in their details, all researchers agree that at least half of all youth brought up in Christian homes will walk away from the faith when they leave home for college or career. Some studies indicate that as many as three-quarters of Christian youth abandon the faith. These are our children. They're teens who come out of strong evangelical homes and churches. They could be your children.

My wife and I have a twenty-four-year-old son and a twenty-year-old daughter. They used to ask us for help with their homework. They asked us about math or geography or science — questions they were expecting to face on tests at school. There was another test they faced regularly, though it never showed up in a class syllabus or agenda. Every student in public school faces this test at least weekly, and every student who listens to music, watches TV or films, or surfs the Internet does, too. This test has items like,

Why can't gays get married?

Who says gay sex is wrong?

I heard someone say the Bible doesn't really teach there's anything wrong with homosexuality.

What about the two men sharing the house down the street? They're great people. I don't see anything wrong with them — doesn't their relationship count, too?

And on it goes. If you haven't heard your teens asking questions like these, it isn't because they're not being tested on them. On Facebook and on film, on the school bus and in the lunchroom, these challenges are unavoidable.

The Turning of the Tide

Can you believe how quickly the world has changed? Today's teens face moral pressures that never entered our minds, and they're navigating relationship c