Defending the Christian faith by demonstrating its reality
Relational Apologetics is about your life becoming a defense of the Christian faith. Every relationship you have is an opportunity for you to connect people to their creator by displaying your hope, both in word and deed. Defending your faith is not just about answering questions and “proving” that God exists. It is about showing that He is real by the way you live. It is about demonstrating the power of God through your holiness. And it is about drawing people to Jesus through your kindness.
Using stories and drawing on personal experiences, Sherrard teaches the importance of holiness, treating skeptics with respect, engaging in authentic conversations instead of shouting matches, and having well thought out answers to the skeptic’s questions. The book doesn’t delve deeply into the scientific and philosophical arguments for the existence of God and the validity of Christianity. Rather, it provides solid, simple, and easily remembered reasons why one should believe in each. It will also teach essential relational skills that are necessary for talking to skeptics and maintaining healthy relationships with them.
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Michael Sherrard is the director of Ratio Christi College Prep and preaching pastor for Crosspoint Community Church. Mike's passion for writing comes from his desire to share truth in a simple way. He and his wife, Terri, live in Peachtree City, Georgia, with their three children.
Preface, 9,
Acknowledgments, 15,
Part One / Who You Are,
1 Holiness, 19,
2 Humility, 25,
3 Readiness, 29,
4 Gentleness and Respect, 37,
Part Two / What You Do,
5 Listen, 47,
6 Ask Questions, 54,
7 Stay on Topic, 60,
8 Stick with What You Know, 65,
Part Three / What You Know,
9 Truth, 73,
10 God, 80,
11 Religion, 90,
12 Scripture, 96,
13 Evil and the Problem of Pain, 104,
Part Four / Where You Go,
14 The World, 117,
15 The Home, 125,
16 The Church, 132,
Epilogue, 141,
Questions for Personal Reflection and Small Group Study, 143,
Topical Resource List, 152,
Holiness
The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today is Christians who acknowledge Jesus with their lips and walk out the door and deny him by their lifestyle. That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable. — BRENNAN MANNING
The Obstacle of Hypocrisy
There are many obstacles to coming to Christ. For many it is not an easy road. There are family issues, intellectual objections, pain, unanswered questions, guilt, pride, and so forth. You do not need to be another obstacle for someone. Sadly, though, the hypocrisy of Christians is a reason — and a fair one — that people reject Christ.
I often hear pastors respond to the claim that there is too much hypocrisy in the church by laughing and saying, "Sure, the church is full of hypocrites, and what a good place for a hypocrite to be." Usually the pastor then adds that there is always room for one more, the idea being that all people are hypocrites at some level. But this should not be tolerated. Hypocrisy is a sin, a serious sin. It is a sin that Jesus addressed. And it is a sin that the church needs to destroy, not joke about.
It is true that people don't always live up to the standard they set for their lives, and it is true that the one who hates hypocrisy likely has moments of hypocrisy himself. There is one difference, though, between the Christian hypocrite and the non-Christian hypocrite. The Christian hypocrite claims to know God and His will. This is no small claim. It is the grandest of all claims.
Knowing God and His will should affect how a person lives. It's hard to imagine that someone could meet God and not be changed. What message is sent by people who claim to know God but live in direct contradiction to His commands? I think it sends the message that they are charlatans and liars. I think it makes the gospel look false and devoid of power. I think it shows that they do not really believe the words they preach. I think it shows that they do not know God.
The fact is, your life either draws people to Christ or it pushes them away. Whether you like it or not, you represent Jesus. Your words and actions have gospel implications, and your life is intended to be a light that guides people to Christ (Matt. 5:13–16). However, when your life is not in step with the gospel, your hypocrisy casts a shadow of doubt over the life-changing message of the cross (Gal. 2:14). For when you, a believer in Jesus Christ, are no different from the nonbelievers to whom you speak, the gospel appears to be nothing more than a fairy tale: a nice story that is without any real power.
If the gospel is to look real to a world that is perishing, you must not look like a fraud. It is for this reason that hypocrisy must be replaced by genuine holiness.
The Objective of Holiness
Christians are commanded to be holy like our God (1 Peter 1:15). We are to pursue pure and righteous living, free from all sin. Perfection is our aim. This is a daunting task. It is overwhelming to know that our lives are to be holy acts of worship to our God (Rom. 12:1–2). Thankfully, pursuing holiness is not something that we do in our own strength. God is working in us, both to will and to work for His good pleasure, and He will complete the good work He has started in us (Phil. 2:13; 1:6).
Even though God will accomplish His purpose in our lives, namely, our holiness, it is still our responsibility to kill the sin in our lives through the power of the Holy Spirit (Rom. 8:12–13). We must act on the power supplied to us every day and seek to become like Jesus. Holiness is a pursuit in this life, not a destination, and when we stop running the race to become like Christ, we will be overtaken by hypocrisy. This is precisely where many Christians are today.
Many of Christ's followers have traded in the pursuit of holiness for the pretense of holiness. It is much easier to pretend to be holy than it is to pursue a holy life. And the easiest way to fake a holy life is to point out the sin in others instead of searching for the sin in your own life. You likely know someone who does this. You may even do it yourself. But understand that God is no fool, and the ability to spot the sin in others is no sign to Him that you are sinless. Rather, it is likely the sign that you are a hypocrite.
The Nature of Hypocrisy
Christians must be concerned more with their own sin than the sins of others. Jesus explained this while preaching on judgment during the Sermon on the Mount. He said, "Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? ... You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye" (Matt. 7:3, 5). Here we see that, according to Jesus, hypocrisy is the result of exposing your brother's sin but not your own.
This was perhaps the greatest problem Jesus had with the religious leaders in His day. Jesus routinely called the Pharisees and Sadducees "hypocrites" because they were concerned more with condemnation than self-examination. They exposed the sins of others yet gave little consideration to their own. In fact, many of them did not even consider themselves to be sinners. But Jesus was not fooled. They were, according to Him, whitewashed tombs: something that looked good on the outside, but had death on the inside (Matt. 23:27).
This hypocrisy in the Pharisees stemmed from their misunderstanding of what it meant to be righteous and holy. They presumed upon their status as Jews, God's chosen people, and did not believe that judgment was on them. Therefore, they were not concerned with holiness; they believed God had already made them holy. They misappropriated God's favor and were blinded by an overestimation of their status. This is dangerous. Relying on past actions is the breeding ground for hypocrisy.
This same problem is in the church. Many Christians presume upon God's mercy as they look back to some past prayer they prayed, and they use it as a license to sin as the Pharisees did. They believe they have escaped the penalty of sin, so they continue to sin. But salvation comes through faith, and faith is active. True believers practice righteousness (1 John 3:9–10). They do not vainly cling to a prayer in their distant past and neglect present obedience. They trust in Jesus daily, and their good works show it (Matt. 5:16; James 2:14–26).
A proper understanding of the gospel should cause Christians to actively pursue holiness. It should cause forgiven men and women to hate the...
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