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Learning to Love

Moody Publishers

Contents

Chapter 1 Protector from Harm...........................9Chapter 2 Better Next Time..............................25Chapter 3 Happier Days Ahead............................41Chapter 4 Encourager Shines Through.....................55Chapter 5 Never Stay Down...............................67Chapter 6 Braver and Stronger...........................81Chapter 7 Freer Hearts Abound...........................95Chapter 8 Tighter Bonding Rings.........................107Chapter 9 Defeater Doesn't Win..........................119Chapter 10 Nurturer Stays Involved.......................131Chapter 11 After Total Security..........................145Chapter 12 Healer Provided Love..........................157Acknowledgments...........................................171Discussion Questions......................................174

Chapter One

At fourteen years old, I already knew about the stresses of life. However, I wasn't going to let the tough times beat me. I am a survivor; after all I'm from the hood. Someway, somehow I was going to find a way to love every part of my dysfunctional world. As I had learned from my middle school mentors, you have to look at life from a positive perspective.

Since it was Labor Day weekend, I was excited to be outside at the hopping neighborhood block party. So much had been happening in my crazy world. Yes, I had lost a brother to suicide over a year ago, and I miss him a lot. But things were finally looking up. Yeah! After six long years of being behind bars, my dad was out at last. Now he's a truck driver and lives near us in Jacksonville, Florida.

My brothers and I were glad to finally have Dad's strong presence in our lives. We would just have to learn how to love each other as a normal family again and find a way for our loss to make us stronger.

Also, my room now has a steady job. She's not struggling and trying to make ends meet by working at dead-end jobs like she used to do. She still works hard, but having a career as a medical technician makes her feel worthy.

My two brothers, York and Yancy, and I are triplets. And they're still acting crazy. No one could tell stubborn York anything. And though Yancy is smart, he hasn't really been applying himself. He thinks he knows it all anyway. My folks were getting stressed with them acting out, so they decided they'd work together and stay on their sons.

My best friend, Myrek, and I are into each other. The guy who I now could admit had my heart was back in my life. He and I are about to meet up down the street.

"Hey, cutie pie," he said as he saw me approach the corner.

We used to live right next door to each other, but since our apartment caught on fire, we had to move to the other side of the complex. Jacksonville in September is still pretty hot, and to be outside at night on a long weekend-let's just say our projects were jammin'.

"Okay, so why you got that basketball?" I asked him, knowing that Myrek loved to play and hoping that he wasn't changing our plan to spend time together. I picked up on the clue that he wanted to go and play ball with the guys in our hood.

"Your brothers were just telling me about this little tournament going on against that wack team around the way," he explained. I knew that he was trying to justify why he was thinking about doing something different.

So I put my hands on my hips and said, "Come on now. We supposed to be doing our thing."

He came up to me and said playfully, "Tell me, how were we gonna kick it today?"

"I guess you'll never find out if you're gonna be playing basketball." Pouting, I turned around and started walking back toward my place.

"Oh, see now, why you gotta do me like that?" He jogged around to the front of me and tossed the ball at me. The hard ball just missed hitting me in my nose.

"Ow!" I screamed extra loud.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"

I swatted at him. "See, you tryna play!"

"I'm trying to play with you," he smiled and said, realizing I was actually okay.

All of a sudden, York and Yancy came up full speed behind me. Yancy almost knocked me down and thought he was being funny. I rolled my eyes at them both. Couldn't they see that I wanted time with Myrek?

"Quit bothering the brother. Let him have a little fun with his boys. Man, y'all just got back together and you already smothering him," York scolded.

The three of them stood there waiting for a reaction out of me. My crazy brother York was really starting to get on my nerves. I wanted to take my foot and kick him in the knee so that he would fall down and run back home crying or something.

But, realistically, I couldn't believe he was gonna call me out like that. He knew how much I had been tussling, wrestling, and all upset that Myrek was dating some other new chick at our school. This girl, Raven, had given me much drama by rubbing it all in my face because she and Myrek were an item. I had tried to push it off like he really didn't matter and act like he was just my friend. But the closer I saw them getting and the more I saw him with somebody else, it really touched my heart that-you know what?-that was my place in his life. I mean, at least we had to give us a try. Myrek had wanted that for so long, but I was the one running in a completely opposite direction.

It was probably because of all the problems we'd been having. And besides, our parents were dating, which could be another complication. Well, now that situation was on rocky ground. My brothers and I secretly hoped that our parents would get back together. But knowing how much distance there had been between the two of them-was that even possible?

"Earth to Yasmin." Myrek interrupted my thoughts. "Hello, hello?"

"What? You wanna go play with them?" I said as I saw him looking at me with puppy-dog eyes. "Then, go play!"

But Myrek turned to the boys and declared, "All right, she's got an attitude, y'all. I'ma stay with my girl."

"Man, you know we can't beat them without you," Yancy pleaded with Myrek and York stood silently backing him up.

It was so cool because my brothers hadn't been getting along. But then the whole fire incident happened and that brought them closer. It was a pretty rough experience. York had gone into our next door neighbor's apartment to help her get out of the flames. Yancy had felt bad and wanted to go in after him. I don't know, but when York came out alive, something changed for us. Maybe it was because we had already lost our oldest brother, Jeff, I guess we all just knew that, as hard as life was, it's a blessing to have each other. So we were learning how to get along and how to care about one another. We were beginning to understand that other people's feelings mean something.

Giving up on convincing Myrek to go along, my brothers went on down the street. I could tell Myrek really wanted to play when he kept fumbling with that stupid ball.

There would be plenty of times for us to be together and have fun. And I did care about his thoughts. So I said, "You know what? I'm just gonna head home. You can play."

Immediately, he got overly excited. "For real? I can play?" Then, without further hesitation, he said, "Come on. I'ma walk you back home."

"What you mean, you gonna walk me back home? I want to watch," I said,...