Über die Autorin bzw. den Autor

David Murrow is an award-winning television producer and writer based in Alaska, most recently working for Sarah Palin. A best-selling author, he is also director of Church for Men, an organization that helps churches connect with men and boys. David and his wife, Gina, have three children.

Auszug. © Genehmigter Nachdruck. Alle Rechte vorbehalten.

HOW WOMEN HELP MEN FIND GOD

Thomas Nelson

Contents

Introduction: Women, Men, and God......................................................ixPART ONE Church Culture vs. Man Culture...............................................11. Where Have All the Good Men Gone?...................................................32. Man Laws vs. Church Laws............................................................133. The House of Horrors................................................................274. The Stars vs. the Scrubs............................................................395. How We Lose Most of Our Boys........................................................496. How the Grinch Stole Youth Group....................................................61PART TWO A Prescription for the Local Church..........................................717. The Kinds of Churches Men Love......................................................758. How to "Man Up" a Worship Service (Without Driving Women Away)......................859. Men Can Learn-Really!...............................................................9710. How to Get James Bond to Go to Church..............................................10711. The Mystery of Male Bonding........................................................11712. How One Woman Can Awaken Her Congregation..........................................131PART THREE How to Reach the Men You Care About........................................14513. What You Do ... What God Does......................................................14714. How We Get God off His Holy Duff...................................................15915. Your Words Whisper; Your Life Shouts...............................................16716. How to Talk to Men About God.......................................................17717. How to Lead Boys to Faith..........................................................18718. Reaching All Those Other Guys (Who Don't Live Under Your Roof).....................20119. How to Support a Man in His Walk with God..........................................21120. Your Mission ... Should You Decide to Accept It....................................225Notes..................................................................................237About the Author.......................................................................247

Chapter One

The sun was nearly set as fifteen women gathered on the deck overlooking Susan's backyard. It was a warm spring evening. The bees buzzed lazily around the bougainvillea as a few crickets began tuning up for their evening of song. The women chatted easily about work, family, and church.

Susan tapped a spoon against her iced tea glass. "Ladies, I'm so glad you've joined us tonight. We are going to devote this evening to supporting one another as we explore what is usually a taboo subject in church today. I mean, have any of you ever talked about this in a group?"

The women shot nervous glances around the circle. A few shook their heads. No one indicated that she had.

Susan continued. "Now, when you received your invitation, I asked you to be ready to answer two questions. I'd like to go around the circle and have everyone very quickly give their names and their answers, OK?"

Heads nodded in agreement.

"I'll start out. My name is Susan, and my number is eight." Susan turned to the woman on her left.

"My name is Juanita, and my number is four."

"My name is Trish, and my number is seven."

"Hello. I'm Theresa, and my number is twenty-three."

The women erupted in gasps, whoops, and laughter. As the noise died down, Theresa clarified, "Hey, I come from a large family!"

The confessions continued. Connie's number was three. Rachel's number was thirteen. Hannah's number was four. Julie's number was ten. And so on.

Once every woman had spoken, Susan added it up. "This small group of women is currently praying for one hundred and thirty-five men. Men we love. Men who need a closer walk with the Lord. That's an average of nine men per person-an average that's much higher, thanks to Theresa!" The women laughed brightly, but inside each carried a dull ache for the spiritual lives of the men they loved.

Number, please

So let me ask you: what's your number? How many guys are you praying for? How many men in your life need a deeper relationship with Jesus?

Grab a pencil and add it up. Let me help you.

Think about your father. Husband. Ex-husband. Brothers. Uncles. Cousins. Sons. Friends. Boss. Coworkers. Do you have more than ten yet?

I'm not asking whether these men are spiritual. I'm not inquiring about their eternal salvation. Nor am I asking if they go to church.

Here's what I want to know: Are these men true disciples of Jesus? Do they enjoy an ongoing, daily walk with God? Are they living a life of love, joy, and peace? Are they connected to a larger community of believers? If not, why not?

Think about your church. Isn't there a significant number of married women who regularly worship without their husbands? Now, how many married men regularly worship without their wives? One or two? Why does it seem that men have a harder time following the Lord than women do?

You're not just imagining it. Christianity is slowly losing its men.

A ladies' club?

Fifty years ago, there would have been no need for a book like this. Men and women attended church in roughly equal numbers. Congregations brimmed with active laymen.

Not anymore.

While the upper echelon of church leadership is mostly male, more than 60 percent of the adults in the typical U.S. worship service are female. The average mainline Protestant congregation is two-thirds female. Many Catholic masses attract a crowd that is 70 percent female. Women compose more than two-thirds of the local church volunteer force and outstrip men in every area of Christian endeavor. They pray more, witness more, and disciple more. Women work while men wimp out.

The gender gap shows up in every age, cultural, and racial group. I wish we could blame Western society for our woes, but the man shortage is a worldwide phenomenon. Christian churches from Minneapolis to Moscow to Melbourne suffer a gender gap. I've received e-mail from pastors overseas whose congregations run 90 percent female.

The men who do attend church aren't nearly as involved as the women who outnumber them in the pews. Experts estimate fewer than 10 percent of U.S. churches maintain an ongoing men's ministry. Compare this to the estimated 90 to 95 percent of churches that offer women's and children's ministries.

Guys and religion

So why don't we just blame the guys? Aren't men just less religious than women?

Not really. No other religion suffers the huge gender gap Christianity does. In fact, Islam seems to have a bumper crop of men. So did the early church. In Bible days, men were the spiritual giants. Today's spiritual giants wear lipstick and eye shadow.

We have a disconnect here. As I noted in the introduction, 90 percent of U.S. men claim belief in God. Five out of six call themselves Christians. But just two out of six U.S. men claim to have attended church the previous Sunday morning. Some experts believe the true number is fewer than one in six.

That last paragraph...