Über die Autorin bzw. den Autor

Ruth Klein is a life coach, author, and speaker. She has appeared on CNBC and her advice has been published in O: The Oprah Magazine, Redbook, the Wall Street Journal, the Los Angeles Times, the Chicago Tribune, Family Circle, Prevention magazine, and other publications. Klein is a featured coach on AOL, where she reaches more than 80,000 AOL users. Visit her Web site at www.destressdiva.com.

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The De-Stress Diva's Guide to Life

When you feel stressed out, you don't have the time or energy to completely overhaul every aspect of your life. You need help for what's bothering you right now and you need it right away! You need the De-Stress Diva.

In this book, America's De-Stress Diva Ruth Klein gives you proven strategies for overcoming seventy-seven common stressors, with practical tips and techniques that you can put to work immediately to rebalance and re-energize your life. The De-Stress Diva understands the many stress points women encounter in juggling work, family, and friends. She has helped countless women overcome the stressful situations that affect them most to bring more joy into their lives, and now she can do the same for you.

The De-Stress Diva's easy-to-follow tips enable you to conquer stressors with the help of:

• Aromatherapy, yoga, massage, and meditation

• Diet, supplements, and herbs

• Organizational and time management skills

So the next time you're angry with your boss or have so much to do you don't know where to start, don't panic read The De-Stress Diva's Guide to Life and take immediate action to relieve your stress and become healthier, happier, and more relaxed. You deserve it!

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The De-Stress Diva's Guide to Life

John Wiley & Sons

Chapter One

1 think positive

We can sabotage the positive ways in which we begin and end each day when we let negative thoughts gain control of our minds. Negatives attract negatives, and negative thinking can cause chronic, dangerously high levels of stress. To downshift the speed and the stress in our lives, we must ratchet down our tendencies to expect the worst or beat ourselves up for things we did or didn't do.

The ordinary stress in our daily lives can be exacerbated by negative thinking and can lead to high levels of hostility, according to a study published by the Journal of Psychosomatic Medicine. Positive thinking, on the other hand, can benefit our physical health, reported researchers at the University of Wisconsin-Madison. The study suggests that people with positive attitudes have less risk of developing heart disease and have lower levels of stress hormones.

secrets from the de-stress diva

Our thoughts color our perceptions and our experiences in life. If there is one thing that we can focus on 99 percent of the time, it is our thoughts. If we are able to focus, we will readily "see" the hundreds of thoughts that arise each day. Here is a simple, yet insightful, way to become aware of your thoughts. It will help you understand your behavior, increase your energy level, and improve your ability to enjoy relationships.

Thought Exercise

Carry around a notepad and write down your thoughts every fifteen to thirty minutes for two full days, from the moment you wake up until just before you fall asleep. You will be amazed at what comes up. Once you identify where your thoughts take you and how they dictate your feelings toward yourself and others, you will have a perfect place to start making changes. Don't be like most people and try to change your thinking process without understanding your own thought patterns.

Here are a few examples of how different individuals express their thought patterns:

The "Yes, but" pattern. This response comes from people who "listen" to what you're saying but, more often than not, will insert a "yes, but" reason why they can't do something.

The "Maybe, we'll see" pattern. People who find it difficult to make a decision react in this way. Perhaps they are afraid to make "wrong" decisions, and thus choose not to decide or to delay their answers.

The "Sitting on the fence" pattern. This pattern of thinking may be the result of people not taking the time to sit quietly and get in touch with themselves. Once individuals can identify and understand their values, they can analyze the pros and cons of every action or decision. Then they can assess how the ramifications of each choice would measure up to their core values. Suddenly, they will know the right answer.

The "That won't work because" pattern. People with this pattern think that if they or other people have previously tried and failed at something, there is no reason why it would work this time. They don't realize that some ideas are too advanced for their time, or that a person's thoughts and confidence level or even a slight change in implementation may bring about a positive outcome.

The "Everything is a drama" pattern. Certain people complain about all the drama, even though drama is what they bring to every task. They will become tired of the drama only when they stop playing dramatic characters in their lives or with specific people or situations. Sometimes we think that being involved in a drama is the only "safe" way to express our emotions, even if these have nothing to do with the situation at hand.

Our thoughts create our world: our lives, our relationships with ourselves and with others. Be the positive change you want to see in your life. An optimistic and calm spirit will shine brightly from within a person, as well as outward to others. We each have the ability to bring sunshine and positive energy to the world.

Meditation

One of the fastest ways to get rid of, or at least minimize, obsessive thoughts or "stuck" thinking patterns is to meditate. Once you have been consistently meditating a little each day for a week, you will be able to create a quiet space in your mind within a minute or less. Remember to be kind to yourself and to honor your thoughts, but don't get downhearted or depressed by them.

Here's a quick, easy meditative technique:

1. Sit up straight in a chair or on the floor.

2. Close your eyes and be mindful of your breathing: breath- ing in ... breathing out.

3. When good or bad thoughts come up, simply thank them for appearing and let them go for now.

4. Return to your focus on breathing.

This meditative state will help you to stop your obsessive thoughts, long enough to get a grip on your emotions or perhaps a new perspective on the situation.

Aromatherapy

1. When you feel your thoughts taking over and you lack focus, write down the thoughts that are preventing you from moving forward. Just get them out of your head by writing them down.

2. Use this lotion formula to massage into your hands:

Add six drops sandalwood essential oil to four teaspoons olive oil.

Rub a few drops of this mixture into your hands, up to your forearms.

Now breathe in and focus on moving forward with inspiration.

3. Think of a positive statement or mantra and repeat it to yourself until you feel the focus and the motivation to move forward.

Gratitude

One universal law says, "That which we focus on and give attention to appears." You may want to share a gratitude statement that I often use: "I appreciate the beauty all around me and am grateful for what I do have."

Food

Artichokes contain high levels of B vitamins, and these vitamins help to increase our energy and mental alertness. Both qualities are necessary for us to maintain a cheerful, optimistic attitude.

Recent research suggests that inflammation is the origin of all degenerative diseases, such as heart disease, arthritis, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's, and so forth. Nature's inflammation fighters come in the guise of fruits. Papayas, pineapples, and kiwifruit contain large amounts of the anti-inflammatory enzyme bromelain, which can lessen the inflammatory process.

2 do you see the glass as half-full or half-empty?

The Wharton School of Business reports that a positive attitude can increase productivity on the job and can inspire more congenial responses from managers and coworkers. "Feelings drive performance," the research study concluded.

secrets from the de-stress diva

I often say it's all in the attitude. I founded the Self-Esteem Council with four other incredible women, and we work with high school students. One course in our five-month program teaches students that it's not so much what happens to us, but how we handle what comes...